Left Behind
by LongLiveTheClones
Summary: It was just another backwater Outer Rim planet, with resources hardly worth fighting over. Yet, there we were, fighting the Seppies like the whole fate of the Republic depended upon it. And, since we were always stretched too thin, the fight was not going well. Rated very strongly T for strong action and steamy romance.
1. Chapter 1 Left Behind

_Updated November 12, 2014._

_A/N: Left Behind is one of the first stories I ever wrote. It is rough and riddled with errors in some places. So, as I work on Left Behind II, I've been re-examining this story, (which seems so short compared to some of my other works), and updating the text. I'm also changing the story in places to reflect the storyline of Left Behind II. I reduced the first chapter by about 4,000 words because it seemed clunky._

_The idea for the story came from a scene in Episode II: Attack of the Clones. The first time we ever see the clones, they are dropped into the arena at Geonosis and save the day. Except there is this one clone who is shot as the gunship is taking off, and they leave him. It inspired a plot bunny. What was going through that clone's mind as he watched the LAAT pull away without him?_

**"Left Behind"**

My name is CT-3064 and I did not desert.

I was left behind.

It was just another backwater Outer Rim planet, with resources hardly worth fighting over. Yet, there we were, fighting the Seppies like the whole fate of the Republic depended upon it. And, since we were always stretched too thin, the fight was not going well.

Again.

At this rate, we're going to run out of clones.

I heard the familiar sound of a brother crying out in shock and pain. The sound just doesn't affect me in the same way it did at the start of the war; I've heard it too many times. At Geonosis, I thought I'd go mad from the chorus of it. Now, I seem to be deaf to it.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw another brother fall. He keeled straight over. Thump.

"Medic!" I yelled out automatically. I'm wasting my breath. The clone medics in our squadron are dead. They've been dead for a while now.

Still, it was reflex. I hear the 'thump' and I shout it. Fekkin' flash training from Kamino.

No medics. Not enough of _anything_. Except for tinnies.

Seems to me whomever is calling the shots back in Coruscant has lost interest in us. Or, maybe the war is over already, and nobody has bothered to tell us. We go through the motions day after day, and the tinnies do it, too. We're all too stupid to know any better.

There are rumors that there won't be a clone left alive anywhere inside of twelve months. We're dying at such a fast clip these days. I believe it, actually. I don't even care anymore. At one time, I could feel. The war has blown all the fekkin' emotions out of me. I'm more droid than the tinnies now.

Three years of fighting and I'm probably just about a perfect soldier by now. I obey orders without thinking. I'm fast and efficient at any task a clone must do. Tell me to shoot something- anything- and I'll do it. I'm too numb to feel anymore. I stopped feeling when I lost every vode I cared about. It hurts too much to feel. Just waiting for the day a tinnie shoots me, too, so I can cease to exist.

"Fall back!"

We're done for now. Fek, yes.

The base is on the other side of this piddly little planet. It's not much, but at least it's a safe place to get something to eat, get some sleep, and forget about this stupid war for a few hours. The droids have never attacked our base. It would seem to be the most efficient way to wipe us out all at once. It's as if they want to drag this war out.

# # #

I remember watching the LAATs touch down and making a run for the nearest gunship. A good number of us had survived the battle. At that point, it was time for the "shoot-the-clones-in-the-back" run back to the larty. It's like a game between us and the tinnies. All we had left to do was not get shot between here and the gunship. We're extra vulnerable as we are boarding.

I made it to the gunship. I was so close to being safe. One of my vode reached out to pull me in. Not many of the new guys bothered to mark their armor anymore, but I could tell all my vode apart by their armor anyway. Even the shinies. Maybe Sky couldn't be considered a shinie anymore with as many scuffs as he had on his armor now. But, he was one of the replacement guys that we picked up after the battle of - hell, I don't remember any more. I stopped getting to know the new guys after we lost Cooper. He died on Agamar. Having a close vod makes all the difference. Losing that vod changes everything.

I was half in, balanced on the rail - the rest of me was holding on to Sky. If he let go, I would plummet back to the planet below. But, he had a good grip on me. Another second or two, and I'd squashed in a seat next to my vode, idly thinking about what they were serving in the mess.

"Incoming!"

The first shot just clipped the ship, but, it was enough to give it a good hard jolt.

A second shot was right behind it...

... and technically, it didn't hit the ship because it hit me.

The pain was searing and intense across my back and even with my filters I couldn't breathe for the overwhelmingly acrid smell of superheated plastoid. I was viciously yanked off the railing, pulling Sky with me. My grip on my vode was so tight the bones in my hand shattered. I not only felt it - I heard it. I screamed and let go as I lost all use of my hand. The other troopers in the ship lunged for us. It was like a sea of white coming for us. But, it was too late. We were already too far out of the ship. I'll never forget the sight of all their helmeted heads looking down at us. I had a clear line of sight, staring straight up at them as we crashed to the ground. I knew immediately they weren't going to come back for us. No one could survive a fall from that height. Sky and I were a mass of kicking and flailing legs.

Sky hit first. I'm not sure why - since I'd fallen out the door a fraction of a second before him.

I still remember the sound Sky's armor made as it impacted with the ground - a peculiar sound like glass breaking. Then, I landed on top of him. My ribs broke first. A different snap from my hand. You'd think that bones breaking would sound the same all over, but they don't. It felt completely different, too. I couldn't even scream, although I wanted to since every part of me was crying out. My head hit last. It takes a great deal of force to crack a trooper helmet. After three years, I've put my bucket through the paces. But, this was the end of it. My bucket slammed into Sky's, and it cracked and split open. I was still conscious for a few seconds. My vision was hazy, and all I could see was blood rapidly pooling on the ground.

As I watched the pool of blood grow bigger, and my vision grew dimmer, I knew I was dying. I was glad, too. I'd killed Sky. It was too awful to think I'd killed another vode.

_Please let me die, please let me die, please let me die_….

I'd finally see Cooper again.

I kept muttering it to myself over and over.

It took a surprisingly long time, but finally, I got my wish and everything went black.

# # #

Tess was looking for guns. She needed to be armed in case Dirk came around again. Why couldn't he just leave her alone? With her father gone, she was more at risk than ever. The arrival of the Separatists had changed the balance of power on the planet. Law and order was virtually non-existent. There was no one Tess could call for help.

Thankfully, Dirk hadn't shown up at her farm in a while. But, he'd be back. She hardly slept anymore, fearing every creak and noise. It was hard enough running the farm by herself, but living in constant fear of a man who wouldn't take "no" for an answer was just getting to be too much.

The battlefield was littered with smashed up droids, and fallen men in white armor. Tess knew that when the Separatists won a battle, they sent a "clean-up crew" through to ensure all the clones were dead. She probably only had a matter of minutes to scavenge for weapons before a crew of armed droids swarmed the scene. These types of battles seemed to happen all the time since the Separatists and the clones had descended upon their quiet little planet and disturbed the peace with all their fighting. The noise of it kept her awake at night sometimes.

Tess didn't see any activity on the battlefield. Everything was eerily quiet. The first couple of blasters she came upon were useless - destroyed in the same blasts that had taken out their unfortunate owners. Tess had better luck as she went along, and found one working DC-15 from an unfortunate clone who had been shot in the head, and found a usable blaster, still clutched in the hand of a disabled droid. She rounded a corner, and came upon a very odd sight. Two clones piled on top of each other, as if someone had dropped them from a great height. She ran closer to investigate, knowing she was running out of time.

She sucked in her breath. The bottom clone was totally crushed, his armor shattered. He was lying in a puddle of blood. He appeared to have broken the fall of the clone above him.

"Didn't do him much good, though," Tess murmured to herself, "someone shot the poor guy in the back."

The clone had a lengthy blaster wound in the back of his armor. He lay completely still and unmoving. His helmet had split, revealing his face. Tess studied the dead clone. She'd never seen a clone's face before.

"You're much younger than I thought you'd be," she said, kneeling down next to him, curiously, to get a better look.

Her father was always telling her that her curiosity was both her best and worst trait. Tess couldn't help it. She was just a naturally curious person. At the moment, she was intrigued by the clone. She peered around quickly at the battlefield. Still no signs of the droids. On impulse, Tess to remove his helmet. It was difficult to get off at first. Tess bit her lip in concentration, then realized it was sealed to the rest of the suit. With a hiss, the helmet released and she was able to remove it the rest of the way.

Tess gasped. She hadn't expected the clones to look like _ this_ at all.

The unmoving figure in front of her was so exotic looking. She assumed a whole race of men bred to be soldiers would be plain looking. This clone had dusky skin, wavy black hair, and long eyelashes. She wondered how old he had sighed, thinking what a waste it was that all these men had to die. For what? Was her sparsely populated planet worth the death of all these young men?

Tess sighed, set down the battered helmet next to the clone, and went back to her task at hand. The clone's DC-15 had been destroyed when he was shot. It was strapped across his back, and was now a melted mess, But, he still had his blaster securely strapped in his holster. Tess reached down to take it. Tess undid the strap that held in place, and began pulling it out of the holster. A strong hand clamped down over hers.

Tess let out a high-pitched scream of shocked surprise. She looked up into the clone's face. His eyes were slightly unfocused, and only opened half-way. But, in his eyes she could see his challenge. He was daring her to try to take his gun.

"You're not dead!" Tess whispered in shock.

The clone didn't speak, just continued to regard her. He blinked hard several times. Tess could see how much effort it was for him, just to try to keep his eyes focused on her. Tess heard a distance rumbling.

"Droids!" Tess said in alarm.

The clone tilted his eyes ever so slightly to the side, wincing as he did so, glancing toward the droids, and then back at Tess. Tess glanced over nervously at the droids. The clone followed her gaze, and then made eye contact with her again.

Tess heard the sound of blaster fire in the distance. Tess rocked back on her heels, and chewed her lip thinking. She looked over in the direction of the blaster fire, and then back at the young, injured soldier lying right in front of her.

He continued to regard her steadily with his exotic brown eyes. He blinked furiously a few times, as if struggling to either stay conscious, or keep his vision focused. Tess studied him for another long moment.

"OK, I hope I don't regret this," Tess muttered to herself. Tess took a deep breath, "I have to get you out of here."

His expression changed to one of surprise.

The droid cruiser had just reached the far end of the clearing. Tess heard shots ringing out. The droids were shooting the fallen clones. She used the cover of trees and bushes to quickly bring her speeder over to the fallen clone undetected. She leapt out of the speeder. His eyes were closed, and he looked deathly pale. Her heart stuck in her throat. Was she too late? Was he already dead? On the far side of the clearing, she heard the disturbing sound of cries ringing out. Not all of the other clones were dead, then. Well, they soon would be. Tess felt sickened by the whole thing. She knelt down by the clone in front of her and touched his face. His eyes flew open.

"Not dead!" she exclaimed.

"Tal," he said so softly she wasn't sure if she had heard.

The sounds of the shots were getting closer. She put an arm under him, trying to lift him. She tried not to think of the fact that he was enmeshed with another human being, who was squashed. Tal cried out in pain. Tess quickly let go, easing him back down.

"Ah! You are a lot heavier than you look," Tess said, looking nervously back in the direction of the droids, "I'm going to need your help to get you in the speeder."

The blaster shots grew more distinct. Tal's eyes flickered toward the droid destroyer.

"You – must—go—now," Tal said, blood forming at his lips as he spoke.

"Sorry, once I have my mind made up, that's it," She slid an arm under him again, "One - two - "

"Go!" Tal gasped out, not understanding why it was this woman was so hell-bent on saving him.

"Listen, soldier! You either come with me, or we both die, right here, right now!" the woman shouted, right in his face, as the droid cruiser came ever closer.

Tal's eyes widened, and he couldn't bear the thought of another death on his conscious, he grabbed onto the woman's arm.

It was fortunate that the droids were in the process of shooting someone just as she was lifting Tal. Well, most unfortunate for the person getting shot, but it did a great job of covering up Tal's cries of pain as he was being lifted.

Tess noticed when the clones cried out in pain, they all sounded the same. Tal's cries from having his broken bones and blaster burns pulled upon blended in perfectly with the cry of another wounded clone being assassinated by the droids.

Tess didn't think she'd ever forget that particular sound for as long as she lived. Tal clutched his mid-section with one arm, and had his other arm wrapped around Tess. Doubled-over and in halting steps, she dragged him into her speeder.

Tess was immensely relieved once she got him settled in the seat. He passed out as soon as he was situated in the seat.

Tess slammed her foot all the way down on the accelerator pedal, pinning it to the floor. She tore away from the clearing, just as the droid cruiser came lumbering around the corner, looking for more clones to shoot.

# # #

Tess kept glancing over at Tal as she rode back to the farm.

"Don't die, OK? I'm sure I'd be in so much trouble if it looked like I was stealing dead clones or something. There have got to be a whole bunch of laws against such things," Tess chattered on nervously to Tal's unconscious form. Blood continued to bubble on Tal's lips, and his pallor was terrible. He looked more dead than alive.

"Oh Tess, you've done some bone-headed things in your life," she murmured to herself, "but this tops them all."

So, all-in-all, what had her trip to the battlefield accomplished?

She had come back with one DC-15, one droid blaster, and one clone blaster, oh, with a clone attached to it.

"I should get my head examined," Tess muttered, as she sped back to her farm. She kept nervously looking behind her, worried that she would be spotted by a droid patrol. Her speeder was uncovered, and the gleaming white clone in the front seat was rather obvious.

Tess' stomach was in knots for the entire trip. She was immensely relieved when she arrived back at her farm. She left the clone in the speeder, while she ran into the farmhouse to prepare someplace to put him.

"Don't die!" she instructed his unconscious form as she ran off.

Tess made recording time preparing a bed in the farmhouse's main room. For most of Tess' teen years, her Mom had been plagued with a chronic pain condition. Her father, a talented farmer/handyman/inventor, had designed a couch/daybed that could easily be converted into a bed. Her Mom spent her last few years living on the bed in the main room. It allowed her to still be a part of the family's day-to-day activities, even as her illness had progressed. The bed had sat in storage for several years now.

Tess pushed the bed in front of the hearth - the warmest spot in the main room- glad the piece of furniture was easily movable. She went back outside to retrieve her clone. Her clone? She halted - mid-step - in the middle of the main room. What was she doing anyway? Was she insane - bringing this unknown soldier into her home? What was she doing hiding him from the Separatists at her farm? What was she going to do with him when he got well? What if he left? What if didn't want to leave? What if...

Tess's father always chastised her for worrying too much about the future, and not enough about the here and stopped worrying, and just started doing - that was her father's way. It was not always the best way, but, it did get things done.

She headed back out to the landspeeder. She had no clever ideas for getting the clone, _Tal_, she reminded herself, into the house. He was still laying pale and slumped in the speeder. He didn't look any better, but, at least he didn't look any worse.

"Tal?" she said, leaning down and speaking right in his ear. "We have to get you in the house," Tess said, "You're too big for me to carry. You'll have to walk."

Tal closed his eyes for a long moment, then looked up at her again. He eyed her, still not moving, his head resting back against the seat rest. Judging by his smashed helmet, Tess figured he had a concussion, and likely a massive headache.

"OK, come on, let's do this," Tess said, kneeling down and pulling one of his arms over her shoulders. She stood up, and start to lift him up. As she started to move him, he gasped and his face turned ashen. He clutched at his mid-section with his other arm.

"Sorry!" she said.

"My -ribs." He could barely get the words out. His breathing was already very labored.

Tess slid her other arm behind his back, doing her best to to avoid the melted armor, and blaster wound. She cast a worried look at his face, wondering if he was even going to survive the short journey into the house.

"Up we go," she said, bracing her knees, and pulling him upright. She could feel that he was helping as much as he could, pushing up with his legs.

As she pulled him up, he uttered the same cry of pain she'd heard in the battlefield. It was the same cry she had heard when the droids were finishing off the surviving clones.

The sound was heart-wrenching. Every part of her wanted to stop hurting him, put him back down, let him rest and stop the pain. But, she knew if she did that he would surely die. He seemed close to death now. She could feel it. She was sure he could, too.

"You can do this," she said, trying to sound encouraging. She was dragging him, as much as guiding him, the few short steps to the front door.

His breathing was so labored that Tess thought he might be close to suffocating. She resisted the urge to look toward his face, because she knew it would only slow down their progress. One way or another, she knew she had to get him inside now and start treating his injuries.

_Just another step,_ she told herself. _Come on, Tess. You can do this. Just get him, one more step._

_Come on, Tal. Just one more step_, Tal was sure he was going to pass out from pain and exhaustion. But, he kept pushing himself, calling upon every trick he'd ever learned during his training on Kamino to push his body just a little bit further.

He knew if he gave up now it would mean the end for him.

_Wait, didn't you just beg to die such a short time ago?_ Somehow, now, that the end was so near, Tal didn't want to die. This odd little farm girl who'd come out of nowhere, tried to steal his blaster, and then dragged him off the battlefield, had brought a spark of interest back into his life. He couldn't quite identify why, but, he felt like sticking around for a while. So, he kept pushing himself. Just one more step.

Tess kept her eyes fixed on the front door, which she had left open as wide as it would go. Never had a few steps seemed like such a vast distance. She was sure that at any moment his labored breathing would stop, and she would be dragging a corpse, and not a man.

"Almost there, Tal, you're doing great," she said, immensely relieved as they crossed the threshold.

Tal's feet caught as the crossed over the threshold and they both nearly fell. She was surprised by how much he weighed. He was not as tall as her father, and she remembered helping her father around before he, too, had gotten ill and passed away. Yet, this clone felt a lot heavier. Tess took a brief moment to study him as well. He looked awful. His complexion was completely grey, except for his lips, which had started to turn blue.

"Just keep breathing, OK?" Tess said, maneuvering him the last couple of steps to the bed.

Tess meant to lower him gently, but it didn't work out that way. Tess didn't think she dropped him. It was more that Tal had finally completely reached the end of his tether and just collapsed, dragging her with him. They fell onto the bed together. Tess was completely pinned under Tal. She could still hear him struggling painfully for air, so she knew there was still life in him. She was afraid to push on him, for fear of injuring him further.

"Tal?... Tal? You gotta' move. I'm stuck underneath you."

There was no response, except for Tal's labored breathing.

"Tal? I don't want to hurt you. Can you move a little, so I can get out of here?"

Still no response. Tess sighed. She hated to do it, but didn't see another way around it. Her arms were pinned, so she just had to wiggle her way free. She shifted her body, and started to squirm out from underneath Tal. As she moved, she heard him gasp in pain.

"I'm so sorry, Tal. I need to get out from under here so I can help you. Can you move?"

He didn't move at all, but Tess could sense he was still conscious.

"Tal!" Tess shouted.

Tess saw Tal brace himself first on one hand, and then tried to use his other hand. He cried out in pain when he tried to use one of his hands. But, then he forced himself to use it anyway. He rolled himself off of Tess, and right onto the blaster wound on his back.

He cried out again, grabbing at his ribs with one hand, while another hand reached back toward the blaster wound.

Tal's eyes were tightly squeezed shut, and his hands clenched and unclenched as he tried to make it through the pain. He also gasped for air. Tess saw tears eke out through his tightly closed eyelids. Knowing how much he was suffering brought tears to Tess' eyes. Toward the end, before her Mom died, it had been really bad, like this... constant suffering... No! Don't think about that now!

Tess jumped up, and knelt down by his side.

"Tal, I know you're in terrible pain. I'm going to treat your wounds, OK? Just hang on."

"Can't... breathe..." the clone gasped out.

Tess noticed the blueness in his lips was spreading. As much pain as he was in, it wasn't the pain that was his foremost concern. Something about his chest injury was preventing him from breathing properly. If Tess didn't figure out what it was, she knew she'd have a dead, suffocated soldier in her living room.

Tess ran into her parents' bedroom. She usually avoided this room. Even now, she still felt the presence of her parents in the room - it made their absence all the more painful. The room was unused, and undisturbed, for the most part. Tess just used it to store all the myriad of medical equipment they'd accumulated during her Mom's long illness. After her Mom died, and then not too long after, her Dad, Tess had just pushed all the equipment into their room and closed the door. She'd never been able to bring herself to sort out their clothes, or give their possessions away. Their room remained an undisturbed temple of sorts to the two people who'd meant the most in Tess' life.

Tess felt strange, even now, entering the room. She felt her parents' presence strongly as she entered the room. It was exactly as they'd left it, except for all the dust, and the unruly collection of medical equipment dumped in there from every corner of the house. Tess pushed aside a bunch of dusty equipment until she found what she was looking for.

She powered up the medical droid.

"One-One-Two-One-bee, at your serv-. How can I - you?"

Oh, yes, the speech defect. Tess had almost forgotten about that. The droid had a faulty voice modulator, so they'd gotten it a discount. Her father said he could fix it, but had never quite gotten around to it. Communicating with this particular droid was always a bit... uh, challenging.

"One-one, we have a patient. Breathing difficulties. Suspect multiple broken ribs. Likely punctured lung. Blaster wound to back. Possible head trauma. Condition serious. Very, very serious. Like going to be dead soon, serious. Got it?"

"Understood. -ake me to -he patient."

Tess grabbed the handheld medical scanner on her way out of the room. She blew dust off of it.

Tess pushed aside more equipment so One-One could easily get through to the main room. She coughed as she disturbed more dust.

"Tess. Diagnosis: Coughing due to - airborne floating particles. remedy - clean more -. Recomm- cleaning schedule -"

"Enough! I'm not the patient! I'll clean this room another day! See to the real patient, please. This way."

Tess led One One to Tal's side..

Tal remained unresponsive. One One had succeeded in completely baring the Trooper's upper chest. Tess's heart sank as she stared at his chest. One side of his chest looked sunken in as compared to the other side.

"-onfirmed punctured lung. Recommend -mmediatiate -surgery," stated One One.

"What about the blaster wound on his back" Tess asked.

"-atient - in respiratory distress. First priority."

Tess sighed heavily. She'd almost forgotten just how frustrating it was to try to communicate with One One.

"Yes, of course," Tess said, realizing that frustrating or not, the medical droid was right. Tess knelt down by Tal's head, not sure if he was still conscious or not. On instinct, she reached a hand out and gently stroked his wavy dark hair. Despite some blood and dirt matted into his hair, his hair felt silky soft under her fingertips.

"Hey, you've got a punctured lung. We'll have to do a little surgery to fix. All you need to do is relax, and the medical droid with the speech impediment will fix you right up, OK?"

Tal gave a barely imperceptible nod, his eyes still closed.

"One One, what do you need?" Tess retrieved a small datapad out of her pocket. One One began rattling off a list of materials, and Tess wrote them all down. Her fingers flew over the tiny keyboard of her datapad. The datapad was smaller than the average datapad, but she could still type on it very quickly. The device had been customized by her Dad, one of his many electronic creations. "Got it!" she said, tucking the compact datapad into her pocket, and hurrying back to the storeroom. She hoped she still had everything One One needed. She'd stopped stockpiling medical stuff after both her parents passed away. With only herself to care for now, there just didn't seem a need for that kind of be told, she hadn't had all that much interest in taking care of herself now that her parents were dead. Who would take care of her anyway, if something major happened? Tess had figured if something majored happened, she would let nature take its' course and just join her parents.

She quickly shoved and pushed things around in the storeroom, looking for everything One One had requested. Well, she didn't have full bottles of the different antiseptics he needed, but she had partial bottles. They would have to do. She found a couple sharps of painkillers, and a few bottles of oral analgesics. She wasn't sure if they were expired or not. But, they would have to do, because it was all she had. There were plenty of bandages and bacta in the first aid kit, and One One had built in surgical implements. They'd just have to improvise with what they had.

_But, I guess it still beats the alternative._

Tess shuddered as she thought of the droids methodically going through the battlefield, shooting every fallen clone. Tess pictured the clones walking up to where Tal was lying, unable to move because of his injuries, and assassinating him in cold blood. Tess walked back out to One One, arms completely loaded up with supplies. She pushed a small sidetable closer to the bed, so that One One would have easy access to everything he needed as he worked. Tess pulled up a stepstool, out of the medical droid's way, sitting on the opposite side of Tal.

"OK, I'm just going to sit here, and watch then. I won't get in the way," Tess said, pulling up a stepstool on the opposite side from where One One was positioned.

She studied Tal, and then thought of all the others back on the battlefield. Try as she might, she couldn't get the sound of the droids shooting the fallen clones out of her head.

_It's just not right, _Tess thought, shaking her head sadly. Tess began to absently-mindedly stroke Tal's cheek as she thought about the war.

She sensed someone looking up at her. Tal's eyes were open, and he was studying her with a bemused expression on his face. It seemed he didn't know what to think of all her attentions. Tess' hand froze where it was, in mid-stroke, on his face.

"Sorry!" she said, quickly removing her hand, and shoving it into one of her pockets.

Tal's mouth quirked into a slight smile, and then his eyes drifted shut.

"Tal? " Tess said quietly, feeling she had to whisper for some reason.

"Patient -as lost consciousness, " said One One, "preparations -omplete for sugical procedure."

Tess watched as One One injected Tal in the neck. One One began to methodically clean the area on Tal's chest where he was going to cut in.

"- ing procedure," said One One, extended out one of his surgical arms to cut down into Tal's chest.

Having grown up on a farm, Tess was comfortable around the sight of blood. So, she wasn't sure why it bothered her to see the droid cut into Tal.

"You're sure he can't feel that?" Tess asked, watching Tal's face nervously, worried he would wake up screaming. She could still hear the echoes of the dying clones on the battlefield. She remembered Tal's own cries of pain as she lifted him in and out of the speeder.

Watching the surgery gave her a sick feeling in the pit of her stomach. Yet, she didn't feel she could leave either. There were times when it seemed One One would run out of hands as he worked quickly to repair the damage caused by multiple ribs breaking at once.

"Is there anything I can do to help?" Tess finally ventured.

"Bathe," One One said simply.

Tess looked down at her dust covered tunic.

She didn't know why she hadn't realized sooner that her clothing, grimy from the battlefield, and even filthier now with smatterings of dust from her parents' room, presented a hazard in a sterile surgical area. With a final regretful glance back at Tal, Tess hurried into her room. She quickly stripped down, throwing all her clothes into an untidy pile. She didn't care about neatness at the moment. She just wanted to get back to Tal, as soon as possible. She took a very rushed shower, scrubbing herself down as thoroughly as possible. She paid extra attention to scrubbing down her arms and hands. She dried off as quickly as possible, and threw on the first clean tunic and pants she could find. Hair still dripping wet, she hurried back to her perch by Tal's side.

"Did I miss anything?" she asked, breathless from her super-fast shower.

"-y done," said One One.

Tess looked anxiously down at Tal. One One had placed an oxygen mask over Tal's nose and mouth.

"Hey, you look better already," Tess said to Tal, even though she knew he couldn't hear her. But, Not having an audience had never stopped her from talking to herself before.

"Broken -ibs repaired. Lung -s repaired," One One announced, beginning the process of closing up the long incision. He quickly and efficiently sealed up the incision.

Tess breathed a sigh of relief. Tal's coloring was already better. His complexion was returning to a normal color again, and his lips were no longer blue. His pained breathing settled into a normal rhythm again.

"Great work, One One!" Tess said.

One One kept a sensor hand extended over Tal's chest, taking readings.

"Procedure was succes-. Proceeding - other injur-."

One One ran the scanner slowly over Tal's blaster wound, and then back over his ribs again.

"Patient still - multiple fractures - severe burn - - region - back."

"Yes, yes, I know, One One. Which are you going to treat first? The other broken ribs, or the back wound?"

One One paused, calculating.

That's not a good sign, Tess thought. One One usually responds immediately.

"Difficult - treat. Multiple injuries- close proximity. Possibility - unfavor- outcome of treatm-."

"What kind of unfavorable outcome if you treat him?" Tess asked, accustomed to One One's disjointed speech. Although, now that she actually had a need for the droid, spending some time, and/or money fixing his vocabulator seemed like a good idea.

"Patient - not lie - stomach due - lung surgery. - treat back - ."

"What if we prop him on his side? It will probably feel hellish on his ribs, but he's knocked out right now anyway. At least he won't be lying directly on his lungs, and then you can reach his back. I can get pillows to keep him propped up on one side, and you can work on him on the other side."

One One paused, considering.

"Yes, - idea. Let's proceed."

Tess hopped up, and rushed to her bedroom to grab all the pillows off her bed. She had plenty of pillows, for which she was thankful, as this meant she didn't have to grab any dusty ones off her parents' bed. No one had slept on that bed since her Dad had died, and she hadn't touched or disturbed the bed since then. During her Mom's long illness, Tess had often propped her Mom this way, or that, to prevent bedsores. Tess was an expert with pillows, and bed propping.

Tess stacked the pillows on top of her stool.

"OK, One One, let's roll him toward me, so his back is facing toward you."

Together, Tess and One One rolled Tal, being careful not to tangle the cord supplying oxygen to his mask. Even though he was unconscious, Tal still moaned when they shifted him onto his side.

"Sorry," Tess whispered to him.

She grabbed pillows, and began expertly inserting them in place.

"OK," she said, letting go.

"OK," echoed back One One.

Tess nodded, glad that One One approved. After her Dad died, Tess had actually left One One activated for a few days just for someone to talk to. It was pretty lame excuse for company, particularly with One One's worn-out vocabulator, but it was all Tess had. Tess was too mentally worn out to even think of doing something productive, like doing repairs on the droid.

Tess had heard the Two One Bee's were a great deal more dynamic than the surplus 20+ year old medical droid that her Dad had purchased in a second-hand store. But, One One was all her family could afford, and, in a way, Tess thought of the quirky, imperfect droid as family.

Tess moved her stepstool around to the other side of the bed so she could see what One One was doing. She sat back several paces, so as to not get in the way.

One One scanned the wound carefully.

Tal's back armor had been completely destroyed, melted away from the blast. The strap from his DC-15 had actually melted into one of the plastoid armor plates. He had a deep burn mark extending all the way down from one shoulder blade, down to the middle of one buttock. If the shot had been just a little more to the center, it would have severed his spinal cord. As it was, he had to contend with the pain of a very deep burn that ran the entire length of his back. It had gone through the skin, and right down into the muscle. One One began methodically cleaning the wound, trimming away ragged edges, and packing it with bacta gel. It took a long time to clean the entire wound.

Tess cringed just looking at the back wound. Since her father had acted as a healer to the local population, Tess had seen blaster wounds before. Normally, the wounds tended to be more localized, and deeper. Because Tal was accelerating rapidly when he was hit, the blaster mark stretched for a long way, but had not punctured deeply. Still, it had completely burned away the skin in all the areas it had hit, and also burned some of the muscle underneath. Tess could only imagine it had been a very painful injury to sustain, and would be painful during the recovery process. One One selected several bandages, and begin to measure them out, carefully snipping and trimming. One One was a rather finicky droid overall, and was fussy about measurements being perfect.

One One began bandaging Tal, starting with shoulder area, carefully covering the top-most area of the back. One One then took some more precise measurements and began working his way down the back, critically examining his work at every stage. For One One, it wasn't just a bandaging job, it was a work of art.

Tess got up to get her hairbrush, knowing that things were going to take a while. One One was a competent medical droid, but speed was not one of his strong suits. Tess stood in the doorway of her room, brushing out her hair, and watching One One work. Standing half in her room, and half in the main room, it now struck Tess as strange that there was someone else in her house.

It had been almost a year since her Dad had died, and Tess was getting accustomed to the long silences and constant loneliness. With One One muttering away, and Tal lying on the bed in front of the heart, the house seemed much less empty all of a sudden.

Tess wondered if she was insane to drag home a complete stranger - a soldier. A clone soldier. A critically injured clone soldier.

What was she going to do with him if he died? Just bury him out back next to the barn? No, that seemed so _wrong_. Bury him in the family grave plot, next to Mama and Papa? Well, no, that seemed rather weird, too. She knew nothing about this clone, other than his name, and that he was rather funny, and that he fell out of a ship.

_The practical thing, I guess, would be to return him to where I found him and just place him back on the batttlefield with the other clones. No one would know I'd ever taken him here._

_But, that seems so wrong, too._

Somehow, the thought of taking his lifeless body, and just dumping it back out onto the battlefield made Tess's stomach turn.

Tess tossed her hairbrush so that it landed back on her dresssing table, and resumed her seat next to One One.

_Well, he's just going to have to not die, _she decided.

One One had finished wrapping all his burns. On the mid-back, and lower back, One One added an additional layer of stiffer bandages to provide support for the broken ribs as they healed.

"I -ave finished treatment of his -ack -ounds. Proceeding to head and hand - mination."

"OK, One One, good job on the back wound. Thanks," Tess said, "I wrapped the hand. But, you can double-check my work."

One One didn't comment, and proceeded to run a scanner over Tal's head first.

"-atient -al has a concussion. No signs -f brain -welling."

Tess breathed a sign of relief. His helmet appeared to have saved his head, even if it did get destroyed in the process.

Tess sat up straight, puzzled.

If Tal was a clone, did he 'belong' to somebody? Clones were not 'citizens.' They were not like regular people. They were, well, clones. So, who did Tal belong to? Was Tess breaking some kind of law by keeping Tal with her?

Tess leaned down to pick up a piece of Tal's armor, and studied the inside of it. Printed on the inside of each piece, near the magnetic locking piece of the gription plate, a block stamp said: "Property of Grand Army of the Republic." In tiny letters, almost too small to read, it said: "It is a violation of E.O.A. 1136 for unauthorized persons to possess, or utilize, these materials without express, authorized permission of GAR authorities."

Was Tal also considered "Property of Grand Army of the Republic?"

One One had finished his examination of Tal's head, and proceeded to treat Tal's hand. The droid methodically reset the shattered bones, performing surgery where necessary to pin some of the tiny bones in the hand. Once finished, the droid wrapped the hand in a plasticast to allow it to heal.

Tess set some water to boil and looked outside the small window over the sink. The sun was already going down.

"Uggh, I am so behind on work today," Tess mumbled, thinking of all the regular farm chores she had completely ignored today. She grabbed a piece of fruit out of the basket next to the sink, and started munching on it while the water boiled. As soon as she started to eat something, she realized how hungry she was. It was past dinnertime, and she'd been awake since before dawn. Other than some tea and fruit, she hadn't eaten all day. She grabbed out a second piece of fruit to eat as soon as the first was done. She quickly demolished the two pieces of fruit. She finished preparing her tea, and then rustled around the pantry for something else to eat. The pickings were pretty slim. She settled for some nuts, dried fruit and crackers to go with the tea and fruit she was already eating. If she had more time, she could prepare something a little more substantial, but there was too much work that needed to be done.

As usual, she briefly fantasized about having better meals, like when both her parents were still alive. With the three of them working together, there was more food in the pantry, and more people to help prepare the meals. These days, her meals were dull, monotonous, and eaten alone. Tess quickly finished a fruit and nut cracker sandwich, and then headed out to the barn to finish the chores she had neglected all day.

She worked in the barn as quickly as she could. It was the fastest she'd completed her chores in a long time. Normally, she didn't much care how long the tasks took. But, today, she was especially eager to get everything done. By the time she returned to the house, it was completely dark and the outside temperature had dropped. She was glad to return to the light and warmth of the main room. But, mostly, she was anxious to check on the welfare of a man she hadn't even known existed when she woke up that morning. One One kept a silent vigil by Tal's side, one sensor arm extended over Tal to constantly monitor life sign readings.

"How's he doing?" Tess asked, as she sat down to unlace her boots by the front door, rubbing her hands together to get warmth back into them.

"-ooper -al is stable," said One One.

After another half hour of sitting, Tess found that her butt was sore from sitting on the hard wooden stool and her eyes were beginning to droop.

She stood, and put the stool back in its' place. She spent a considerable amount of time and effort pushing, pulling and dragging her Dad's worn, comfortable recliner into a position next to the bed.

"OK, that was a lot harder than I thought it would be," she said aloud, to no one in particular. After several years of being on her own now, she was used to having conversations with just the surrounding air. Loneliness had been her companion for quite a while now. Well, loneliness, along with hard work, poverty, and fear.

She went and brushed her teeth, grabbed a blanket and a pillow off of her bed, and settled into the comfortable chair. Within minutes, she was asleep.

# # #

Everyday for the next week, One One monitored Tal's vitals constantly while Tess rushed through her duties of taking care of the farm. She spent every spare moment sitting by the clone troopers' bedside, talking to him, even singing to him sometimes. She liked to sing, and hadn't had anyone to sing to since her parents died. He did not awaken at all during those first several days. Tess felt if she abandoned her vigil, he would die, leaving her all alone once again.

Tess would watch him sleep, the oxygen mask strapped over his dusky, exotic features. Her isolated farm upbringing had afforded her little actual outside contact with people different from herself. There was something deliciously different and exotic about Tal. In truth, the physical appearance of this injured clone was absolutely fascinating to Tess.

Tess had taken to spending all her free time curled up in her father's chair, sipping her tea, and just studying this man. The clone was still propped up on his side, since his injuries prevented him from lying comfortably either on his back or front. His body position faced him toward the kitchen. By the third day, Tess noticed him wakening for brief periods of time. His eyes would flutter open, briefly track her movements, and then flutter back closed again. One One kept the oxygen mask on the trooper as long as they could. By the sixth day, they'd run out of oxygen. They'd only had a canister and a half to start with, so it was now depleted. One One seemed unconcerned by the supply shortage, announcing in his halting, choppy speech that the trooper was of the danger zone. The oxygen mask was removed, and Tess put the whole set-up back into storage with the rest of the little used medical gear.

Nearly a week had passed since Tess had dragged the stranger home. Tess could see he was starting to awaken for slightly longer periods of time. Her movements in the kitchen seemed to attract his attention the most - perhaps it was the sounds of metallic spoons scraping against metallic pots, or banging against their old metallic sink. Most everything they had was made of metal - forged and shaped by her father, a brilliant man talented with both metal and electronics - but, with the bad fortune to be borne and stuck on a backwater planet at the edge of nowhere in the Outer Rim.

Tess would see the trooper's eyes tracking her movements through hooded, half-open lids. His body didn't move at all. He hadn't moved since One One had completed the lung repair surgery. Tess suspected One One was keeping him heavily sedated until the lung was sufficiently healed, but she hadn't questioned the droid on the specifics.

Even though Tess hadn't found a lot of painkillers in her medical stash, sedatives were in ample supply. Her Mom's illness had been long and painful, slowly wasting away her muscles. The sedatives had helped to some degree, especially in those last few months.

Tess hadn't been sure if the medications were still good, but One One had tested them, and declared them still usable.

Once One One had announced that the clone was out of the danger zone, Tess felt confident enough to leave him alone for longer periods of time. She felt assured enough he would still be alive when she returned to the farm house. She put on her extra warm coat, gathered up the two guns she had gathered during the battle, (she considered the third as still belonging to the clone), and left in the speeder.

She didn't return until it was almost dark. She noticed the clone's eyes tracking her movements when she returned. When she made eye contact with him, there was a question in his gaze. She gazed back into those eyes, lost in them for the moment.

He tilted his head slightly, asking the question again. Tess shook her head to clear it, pulling herself back to the moment. He had noticed her absence. He wanted to know where she had been for so long. Tess decided to just dodge the question. Tess gave him a warm, reassuring smile. She quickly pulled off her boots, walked over, and sat by his side, still wearing her heavy coat. He cocked his head slightly, taking in her heavy coat, the questioning look still in his eyes.

One One had said Tal might not remember anything that happened the day of the surgery, including her, due to the severe trauma his body had undergone. Tess took his good hand in hers, and gave it a comforting squeeze. She turned to One One.

"How is he?"

"-ooper -al is stable. -e continues to improve."

Tess smiled at Tal. He met her gaze steadily, looking at her curiously.

# # #

Tal was exhausted. He was starving. He was burning up with thirst. He had no idea where he was. This was definitely **not** a clone medical facility. Where were all his brothers? Surely they hadn't left him behind? Tal tried to squelch his growing sense of panic. And, the woman... Who was she?

Tal had never spent much time around human females before. The past few days were just a hazy blur, but, he could remember now hearing this woman's voice talking to him, and even singing to him. He also remembered her holding his hand. Why would she do that? What purpose did that serve? And, he hurt. He hurt a lot in many different places. His entire chest ached. His lungs ached every time he sucked in a breath. He was sure he had either broken bones, or surgery, possibly both. It was the only thing that causes a deep burning internal pain like this. His throat was so dry that he knew he couldn't even attempt to speak. He felt he would surely choke if he did. His back burned, yet felt itchy and raw at the same time. It must be a blaster burn, healing under bacta. Only bacta could itch like this as it regenerated skin and muscle. His hand ached in several places with the same sort of internal pain that spoke of more fractures. And, his head throbbed if he tried to move it. Tal was miserable.

When a brother was injured like this, his other brothers were supposed to defend him and take care of everything. It was the code of honor amongst brothers.

Tal squeezed his eyes shut, trying to remember recall how he'd gotten injured and ended up in this strange place. But, everything was so muddled and confusing at the moment. Tal was trying not to panic, but he had no control over his surroundings, and no way to gain control. Tal sighed, and then regretted it, because the deeper breath increased the ache in his lungs.

Tal heard the now familiar sounds of the woman in her kitchen. Tal opened his eyes, and tracked the woman's movements. He watched her move about her kitchen, preparing her usual cup of tea. The woman drank a lot of tea. The thought made Tal feel even thirstier. He would give anything right now for a sip of just about anything. He watched as she pulled out a large pot, and pulled together some ingredients. She began to grate and chop, adding things to the pot. She hummed as she worked.

He drifted off to sleep again.

# # #

He awoke to a pleasant smell that made his stomach growl impatiently. He was alone with the medical droid again. He sighed, and then squeezed his eyes shut at the ache in his chest. Tal waited for the woman to show up. She finally showed up, just as darkness was starting to fall. She was wearing her heavy coat again, and mud covered her boots. She looked exhausted. Tal couldn't resist speaking out any longer, painful, parched throat or not. He was fed up, and he wanted answers.

"Wh- wh- wher- ," his first attempt at speaking ended up in a coughing fit as his parched throat contracted painfully. Tal's eyes teared up with pain as the coughing brought up fresh spasms of pain in his broken ribs. The woman was instantly by his side, a comforting hand on his shoulder.

"Shh- shhh, take it easy," she said, in soothing tones, gently rubbing his shoulders.

She looked at the medical droid, who was taking readings, but had not sought to offer any kind of comfort.

"One One, can I give him water?"

"Yes."

She smiled at Tal, and rushed away to the kitchen, returning in just a moment with lukewarm water in a chipped mug.

Tess sat down on the edge of the bed, and lifted his head into her lap. He was still lying on his side. Tess brought the mug to his lips. Tal noticed her earthen aroma again. No one had ever mentioned to him before that females smelled like this. He was sure he would have remembered if someone did.

"Take it slow," the woman said, as she cradled his head to her chest, helping him drink the glass of water, "I'm sure you're very thirsty, but just small sips for now, OK?"

Tal eagerly took a few small sips, sighing in satisfaction as the burning in his throat finally eased. Then, groaning slightly as the sighing made his ribs ache. The woman looked down at him in concern.

"Are you OK?"

Tal nodded. The movement caused his head to brush up against her breast. The woman seemed not to notice. She gently laid Tal's head back down on the pillow, and placed the glass of water on the table next to the bed.

"I'll get you some broth, OK?" she said.

Tal nodded. His stomach growled in anticipation. He flushed, embarrassed. She laughed. Tal liked the sound of her laughter. She stood up. She walked back over the door and removed her coat. Tal closed his eyes for a moment, immensely relieved that his throat didn't feel so parched anymore. His traitorous mind jumped from those thoughts to reliving the sensation of nodding his head up against her breast.

_You idiot!_ he scolded himself, _she was just helping you get a drink of water!_

Still, Tal had never had any close contact with human females before, so all these sensations were entirely new to him. He couldn't help but be intrigued by them. And, hidden beneath her simple farm clothing, Tal could tell Tess was an attractive woman. Attractive with very nicely shaped...

Tal tore his mind away from its current line of thinking and focused on what the woman was doing now. Food. OK, food. A safe topic. He watched her ladle into a bowl from a well-worn pot that had been simmering on the stove all day. She placed the bowl onto the counter.

She put the soup down on the side table. She tucked the towel underneath his chin. She then lifted his head, cradling him against her chest, as she had done for the glass of water. She spooned the first bite of broth into his mouth. Tal wanted to protest, saying he didn't need to be spoon-fed. Being helped by a brother in the medbay was one thing - brothers had a code of honor. Brothers always helped out other brothers. Having anyone else perform this sort of duty for you, well, it was most unsettling for Tal. And, being taken care of day and night by a woman that he had to admit he was finding increasingly attractive? Just the thought of it made Tal feel weird in ways he didn't know were possible. But, the moment the first bite of food hit his system, all protests were gone. He didn't care anymore about anything except getting food into his system. He realized he was not only hungry, he was _ravenously_ hungry. He didn't care how, or by whom, that food was getting into his system. He just wanted, and needed, food. She was, in fact, competent in the performance of all these duties, and Tal definitely preferred her company to that of the droid.

"That's it. You finished the whole bowl," she said, delicately cleaning his lips with a soft towel.

Tal looked up at her, and cocked his head, thinking two things at once. She was very pretty this close-up, and he wanted more food, NOW. Just like most every clone he knew, Tal had a ravenous appetite. His buddy, Cooper, a medic, had theorized their constant need for food came from their rapid aging. Tal felt that same stabbing emotional pang when he thought of Cooper. Cooper was listed as Missing in Action, since nobody had seen him actually get hit. But, the moment they'd lifted off from that planet, nobody could reach him by radio either. And, they had withdrawn from the planet so quickly there'd been no time to go back and look for Cooper. Thinking about it still pained Tal. They'd left Cooper behind.

"Hey, are you OK?" Tess was looking at him, giving him that concerned look again. It caught Tal off-guard. The only person who had ever cared watched out for him was Cooper. They'd been best friends since their early years of training on Kamino, and were lucky enough to be assigned to the same squadron. They'd always watched each other's backs. Once Cooper was gone, Tal had simply stopped caring about the war. "Eat too much of this right in the beginning, and this broth could come right back up. That could be very painful with those broken ribs, and a half-healed lung."

Tal studied her curiously. He did feel better, overall, now that he at least had something in his stomach. He wanted to stay awake for a while, maybe she would talk to him and tell him something useful. But, finally having food in his belly made him very drowsy. He heard her start singing softly to him again. He didn't even remember falling asleep.

# # #

In the morning, she actually woke him up.

"Hey, I have to head out to the orchard. I wanted to give you something to eat before I went out. Sorry to wake you up."

Tal wanted to say it was OK, and thank you, but he didn't feel up to try speaking again. It had been terribly painful the last time. His lungs and chest still burned and ached. Still, he felt like he was healing. Everytime he woke up, it was a little easier to breathe. He was looking forward to being healed enough to both breath and speak, so he could find out where on the planet his brothers were fighting. Tal hadn't heard any larty's going by overhead the entire time he'd been here. He refused to let his brain carry things to the next possible conclusion.

There was no way he'd been left behind. He'd squelch the thought the moment it would creep up - which was more and more often, now that he was staying awake for longer periods of time.

There was a bowl of food, and a glass of water already set next to him on the table. She was already dressed in her work clothes, her hair tied back, and her skin smelling freshly scrubbed with soap. Tal liked the smell of the soap. He was beginning to associate the smell with the fruit farmer. It was an earthy, natural fragrance, with just a hint of something sweet.

He became conscious of the fact that he hadn't bathed in many days. He wondered how badly he smelled, and wished very much that he could scrub himself down with a bar of soap.

Once again, she expertly lifted his head, spooning the broth into him. She dabbed at his lips with the towel, whenever any dribbled out onto the sides. Tal realized he didn't care so much anymore that somebody was feeding him. It was just the three of them - him, this farm woman, and the droid. What did it matter? The broth was gone all too soon. Tal wished he could have a substantial meal. He was still hungry. She gently lifted his head, and gave him sips of water.

Tal found that his throat hurt a lot less now. It wasn't the same painful, fiery inferno it had been just a day before. But, his chest still ached every time he inhaled and exhaled. Tal reached a hand out, and gripped her hand in his. "Th- thank - yyou," he breathed out, surprised how much effort it took just to stammer out those two words.

She headed into the kitchen, and quickly washed his breakfast dishes. Tal just watched her, feeling confused and unsettled. Tal watched as she donned her lighter work coat, and put on her work boots. His eyes narrowed. She wasn't donning her heavier work clothes. He'd noticed she had two distinctive work patterns- one where she wore the light work clothes, and the other where she donned the heavier work clothes, and was gone for longer periods of time.

"I'll be back to check on you in a few hours," she said. "One One is here if you need anything."

She disappeared out the door.

# # #

Tal woke up slowly. His body still hurt. He hurt **a lot**. He'd been sleeping very deeply, dreaming of the last battle he'd fought. His mind felt disjointed. He felt a terrible sense of loss, along with the anxiety that he was not where he was supposed to be. Part of him wanted to wake up, and shake off the dreams, but another part of him kept drifting back into sleep. He hovered between the two states - captive to too many memories. He remembered the battle, but somehow the memory kept getting entangled and ensnared with bits and pieces of other battles he'd fought over the past three years. Some of it was disjointed, and made no sense at all. And, some of it was painfully vivid.

Getting left behind somehow kept getting tangled up with the guilt of leaving Cooper behind. Hearing droid killing squads was getting entangled with hearing, and then seeing, droid killing squads mercilessly finishing off Cooper. The dream then progressed into a replay of the events that landed him into the home of the strange little fruit and eopie farmer.

Tal remembered yelling: "Medic!" But, he also remembered the grim hopelessness, knowing no medic was coming. He remembered how he had almost missed the gunship, and thought for a moment he was going to be left behind. He remembered the kindness of a brother, who pulled him in to the larty, saving his shebs from being stranded on the battlefield. He remembered the terrible sense of impending doom as someone shouted: "Incoming!" Those shots were coming for him. He vividly recalled that tiny delay between when he was hit, and when all the sensations of shock flooded his system. Most of all, he recalled all of the smells, the burning plastoid, the scorched fabric from his bodysuit, and that sickly sweet scent of charred flesh.

He remembered struggling so hard to keep his body under control, so that he wouldn't drag Sky out with him. But, there was that terrible moment when his body just went slack, and he fell off the rail. He briefly made eye contact with the other brothers in the ship as they all reacted at once. Their clone reflexes had at all kicked in as one and they made a simultaneous grab for him. But, the laws of physics couldn't be denied. He was too far away, and they couldn't reach him in time.

He remembered his horror when he realized that Sky had still been dragged out with him. He was terribly upset about this- much more so than about anything that had happened to him. Not the fall from the gunship, or the blaster shot to his back. No. It was his role in the fall of a good brother. It just seemed so wrong. He remembered hearing someone scream, and realizing it was him. He remembered hearing someone else scream, and realizing it was Sky. Sky was very well liked within the squad. He was the type of brother who was always watching out for everyone else. Cooper always described guys like that as "the best kind of brother."

Tal remembered the sounds as they hit the ground - the shattering sound of glass breaking. He remembered the split-second realization that Sky was dead.

Everything started to blur together, and become disjointed… events begin to blur together, and rewind…

Tal was falling once again...

Sky was right below him, also falling...

Tal was screaming. Tal twisted and looked down. Below him was the ground, and death. Right above him, his brother of salvation, there amongst the clouds- Sky.

The dream shifted again, and everything took on a black and red haze from the belching fire and smoke of the droid's relentless cannon fire. It was hard to see anything in the hellish inferno. Tal was running for the gunship. He didn't want to be left behind. He just made it onboard, and the ship lifted off. As he peered up at his brother and the gunship, everything looked red from the reflected fire below below- Sky's armor, the gunship, and even the sky itself had a reddish tint to it.

"Incoming!" Doom. He was doomed. It seemed like such a long wait now as he just hung there in that reddish haze, gazing up now at the red Sky, and waited to be hit. Red Sky didn't seem to be nearly as brotherly. When the shot finally hit, Tal was almost relieved. His back caught fire, and he let go of the rail. As he and Sky fell things grew hotter and hotter. He felt, more than saw, Sky hit the ground, and heard the shattering of Sky's armor. His head still hit Sky's with a sickening thud, but this time Tal didn't black out. He felt Sky's head rotate and turn under his. Sky's bloodied head and bloodshot eyes looked right into Tal's eyes - harsh and accusing. Tal had committed the ultimate crime - he had killed another brother. Sky's body suddenly erupted into flames - consuming Tal in the fiery inferno. Tal screamed, and tried to roll away. Tal felt his back explode into agony, and then his chest.

"Lie still!"

Tal tried to roll away from the flames, but the more he tried to roll away, the worse the pain became.

"Be still! You're safe here!"

Tal heard a soothing voice and felt cool hands pressing down on his bare shoulders.

"Tal! Lie still!"

"Cooper?" Tal whispered hoarsely, his throat so dry that he began to cough. The coughing made the pain even worse.

"Tal, here, drink this, here."

He felt someone try to hold something up to his lips. He didn't know what it was. He turned his face away. He felt the flames leap higher, surrounding him, searing him, through his chest. Tal tried to roll away from the flames, but when he did, his back exploded with pain. Tal cried out from the pain. He tried to get away from the pain.

"Tal! Calm down! Please! You must be still or you're going to injure yourself further!" It sounded like a woman's voice. The voice sounded familiar, too. How could that be? He'd had very little interaction with civilians.

"Cooper? Where are you? Report your location," Tal felt himself beginning to panic. Why wasn't Cooper answering his comm? "Cooper! Coop! Where are you? Damnit, Coop! Answer me!"

"One One, what's wrong with him? Should we sedate him again?"

Tal heard the automated voice of a droid. He heard the words: 'Concussion. Memory loss. Confusion.' But, all he could focus on was one thought: Droids.

"Coop! Droids!" Tal cried out.

Tal felt a hand on his shoulders again. Tal reached up to strike at the droid. But, he could barely move. His arms were so leaden. He succeeded in getting one hand up but his arm felt strangely heavy and stiff.

"Easy with your hand, Tal, you fractured it."

He felt someone grab his hand, and hold it gently, lightly touching the fingertips. There was something about the voice… He reached up with his other hand.

"That's it. No one can hurt you here. You're safe, Tal."

It had been his intent to strike out, but his movements were so slow that someone just gripped his other hand as well. But, he realized, it was an organic hand. Human. Not droid. The hand held his, giving it a reassuring squeeze. The hand began stroking his, lightly brushing the back of his hand, soothingly massaging his fingertips and the inside of his palm. OK, no droid had ever done _that_ to him. It was very pleasurable.

Tal was very confused. Nothing made sense. Droids. Combat. Shoot. Retreat. Squad. Cooper. Those things made sense. These new sensations coming at him were just too far outside the realm of his 13 years of life experience. He was in unfamiliar territory, and it was somewhat terrifying. Why did his head feel so foggy? Tal forced his eyes open. Everything was blurry at first. Just bursts of bright light. Tal kept blinking his eyes, trying to focus.

"That's it," came the soothing voice.

Tal felt gentle hands on the side of his face. He turned his head in the direction of the voice. He spotted a woman. Did he know her from somewhere? His head was pounding, and his vision was swimming. He couldn't think clearly. The hands continued to stroke his face gently. Tal tried to focus his attention on the woman. The lingering affects of his dream began to subside. Tal felt his breathing slow down, and he stopped trying to move. His back and chest still ached terribly from his recent movements.

"No, One One, forget the sedation. I think he's OK, now."

Tal squinted against the light in the room, his head still aching.

"Too bright," he rasped out hoarsely, covering his eyes with one arm.

"One One, turn the lights down."

One One rolled over to the light switch, and slid it down.

There was a slight pause, and then, the female voice gently asked, "There Tal, is that better?"

Tal peeked open just one eye - the lighting had dimmed considerably. He slowly put his arm back down again, discouraged that the simplest movements were so difficult for him to complete. He gave a weak nod, and then winced. What was wrong with his head? Was there any part of him that didn't hurt? He felt awful. He licked his lips, which were painfully dry.

"Water?" the woman asked. Tal nodded again, and then winced. He wasn't sure which would hurt less, nodding or speaking. Tal felt a gentle arm lift his head, and give him a glass of water. His back still felt like raw, hot and painful from top to bottom, and his chest ached fiercely. He felt himself get cradled against a soft, comforting chest. It was a nice feeling. He couldn't remember ever getting cradled like this against a clone medic's chest, and he wasn't sure he would like to be either. Civvie women seemed to be soft in all the right places. He had to admit he liked the feeling. He still wasn't sure where he was, but it didn't seem to be all bad.

"Slowly. Just small sips, OK? Is that better?"

Tal gave a small nod. "Who are you?" Tal asked, his voice cracking.

"You don't remember?" Tess asked, frowning slightly.

Tal shook his head, and then winced, putting a hand to his head.

"Does your head hurt today?" she asked.

Tal began to nod, and then thought better of it. This was one of the worst headaches he could ever remember having. He whispered simply: "Yes... ma'am. It does." Tal struggled to remember proper etiquette for dealing with civvies. His flash training on Tipoca City seemed like a lifetime ago. The past three years of constant warfare had not prepared him for the simplest of tasks - such as dealing with people from the outside world.

Tess leaned forward and began massaging his temples. Tal closed his eyes, and leaned in to her touch. He moaned in pleasure as her fingertips moved around his scalp, finding the pressure points, and helping ease the pain.

"Is that helping?" she asked, in what sounded like a mildly amused voice.

Tal was reluctant to speak. He was enjoying the moment too much. He just grunted out: "Uh huh," and then remembered at the last moment to add in, "ma'am." She continued to massage his head for several long minutes. She seemed in no hurry to stop, and Tal was perfectly content to let her continue. He couldn't remember anyone ever taking the time to heal him in such a manner. Before it had always been pain killing injections and bacta. This was a completely new experience to him. As the pain continued to improve, he found it easier to form a coherent thought again.

"You're not GAR," Tal said, hoarsely. It was more of a statement, than a question.

"GAR?"

"Republic Army," Tal clarified.

"That would spell RA."

Tal simply lifted one eyebrow in response, but didn't bother opening his eyes. She could call the Republic Army whatever she wanted. He didn't care. She had a good way of making pain go away.

"Do I know you?" Tal finally asked, peering one eye open, studying her curiously for a moment, before sighing in contentment and relaxing again into the gentle touch of her hands.

"We met about a week ago, but you were in pretty bad shape that day. I'm Tess. I pulled you off the battlefield."

# # #


	2. Chapter 2  The PastNew Beginnings

"**Left Behind"**

**Chapter 2**

Tal woke up late in the afternoon. At least, he thought it was late in the afternoon. He slept so much it was hard to keep track of the days. But, judging from the sun's rays coming in through the kitchen window, it appeared to be getting on toward evening.

When Tal looked toward the window, he felt restless and confined. He longed to be outside again, since as a regular infantry trooper deployed in the Outer Rim, he'd spent much of the past three years outdoors. He'd grown used to being outside almost of the time, except when he was sleeping. And, when conditions called for it, he slept outside as well. He wasn't used to prolonged resting time. It was yet something else that was strange and different to him. It was... unsettling. Usually when Tal had broken bones and burns like this, he was quickly pieced back together again with bone knitters and a full-sized bacta tank. He was sent back out to the field with the greatest expediency possible.

A voice startled Tal out of his musings. "How are you feeling?" Tess asked. He hadn't even heard her approach. Tal was annoyed with himself. Like all clones, he prided himself on having reflexes superior to normal humans. Usually, no one could sneak up on him. But, it seemed with the blow he'd taken to his head, his keen senses were off-kilter. Annoyed at this new discovery, Tal added this to the list of parts of him that were damaged.

"I'm fine," Tal muttered, automatically. It seemed to be a standard clone response, because all his brothers said it, even when they had body parts sticking out and falling off.

Tess laughed, "Very good, soldier. OK, how are you, really?"

Tal studied her for a moment, and found his depressed mood lifting. When she was near, he forgot all about the places where he was still achey and sore. And, he had many, many places where his body still hurt. Frankly, he was still surprised that he wasn't dead.

"Well…I feel…." Tal still wasn't sure of the proper polite response, "less damaged?"

Tess put her head back and laughed. Tal cocked his head to the side, and just watched her laugh. He liked the way the light reflected off the curve of her throat. He suddenly realized she was watching him watching her. He flushed, embarrassed.

"Is everything alright, Tal?" Tess asked, looking concerned.

"Huh?" Tal answered, unable to come up with a better answer on the spur of the moment.

She frowned, and put a hand up to his forehead, "You don't have a fever. Are you experiencing mental confusion and disorientation?" Tess questioned.

Only around you, Tal wanted to answer. But, he didn't. He decided to change the subject because he wanted to keep Tess talking to him longer. He didn't want her to go off to tend her eopies again, or to that other place she went when she was gone for even longer periods of time. "I remember you now," Tal said, hoping that was a good conversation starter.

Tess brightened and looked pleased, "You do?"

Tal started to nod, and then immediately stopped, wincing. Tess noticed right away, and her hands were already reaching out, searching out trigger points around his skull again. Tal sighed happily, relaxing into her touch.

Tess laughed, "You like this, don't you?"

Tal was just about to nod again, and then thought better of it. "Yes, ma'-…Tess." It felt a bit strangely intimate to call her by her first name, especially when she was giving him such a nice scalp massage.

"What do you remember, Tal?" Tess encouraged, softly, leaning in so that she could look him in the eyes as she worked her fingers around the trigger points in his skull.

"You tried to touch my blaster," Tal blurted out.

Tess reddened, "Yes, sorry about that. I didn't mean to just grab it like that. I never would have just grabbed it like that- had I known. I mean, I don't normally go around grabbing- I thought you were-" she stopped, mid-sentence. She looked away, and flushed an even deeper shade of red. Suddenly, she was at a complete loss of words. There was a short, uncomfortable silence, and her hands had stopped their massaging.

"Dead?" Tal supplied simply.

Tal reached up with his good hand and directed Tess' face back so she was looking at him again. It hurt his chest to stretch out like that, but it felt nice to touch Tess' skin. It was a fair trade-off. "Tess," Tal said, "it's OK. I'm not dead."

Tess suddenly laughed, startling Tal again. Tal cursed softly under his breath, annoyed again at himself that his reflexes were so off. Tess put her hand up over Tal's, "I'm sorry, Tal. I didn't mean to startle you again. It's just that you said that to me. You said you keep calling me 'not dead.' You said to me that 'My name's isn't-"

"-not dead, it's Tal," Tal finished, "yes, I said that."

Tess beamed at him, "You do remember!"

"Yeah," Tal acknowledged, his hand still interlocked with Tess', "you took a huge risk pulling me off that battlefield. You could have gotten killed. You could have just taken the blaster and gone."

"I know," Tess said, softly.

"But, you didn't," Tal said, still not letting go of her hand. He noticed she wasn't letting go either. Tal liked having her around. It was like the companionship of a brother, a really good one, like Cooper, (or Sky, Tal thought with a pang.)

"No, I- I couldn't just leave you there," Tess said, as if that statement alone could somehow explain what she did.

Tal was lost in thought, thinking about Sky, but also thinking about Tess and what she'd done for him. He was trying to reconcile the two, the life he had before and the woman he'd just met. As he took a deep breath, he noticed Tess always had this amazing earthy aroma. Tal looked up at her, thinking he'd never met anyone quite like her. Tess seemed to be studying him in return, and they stayed like that, just looking at each other in mutual curiosity. It was a pleasant, warm moment, broken by the braying of an eopie.

Tess looked up, toward the barn, "I should get back to work," she placed a gentle hand on Tal's arm, lightly stroking it, "and you need to rest."

Tal didn't want to rest. All he did was rest. But, Tess was already leaving, back to her chores and eopies. Tal let out a sad sigh as he watched her go, thinking he didn't much like these eopies. She paused, though, at the door, looking back and giving him one last smile. Tal couldn't help but return the smile still wondering why somebody so pretty was putting so much energy into saving a clone like him.

# # #

As Tess stabbed at forkfuls of hay in the barn, she muttered to the eopies. "Too handsome. I'm in so much trouble. What was I thinking bringing home somebody who looked like that? Well, I guess at the time, I guess I was just so focused on the droids, and the shooting, and the danger, and the fact he was injured. But, now, by the light of Kali's moon, what am I going to do with a man that handsome living under my roof?"

The eopies stared back sympathetically as they chewed their cud, as if they, too, faced such problems in their everyday lives. Tess sighed, and reached out, scratched the nearest eopie behind the ears. The eopie bumped it's head up against her shoulder affectionately.

Tess leaned her head up against the eopie's head, so that they were looking eye-to-eye, "What am I going to do?" Tess asked the eopie again. The eopie blinked back at her, and continued to chew.

# # #

When Tal next awoke, he could tell he'd slept another long stretch of time. He was groggy, hungry, thirsty, and the lighting had changed again in the window. The overhead lights were still dimmed, and he was glad, because his head still ached. He didn't feel he could tolerate bright lights or loud noises. OK, admittedly he'd lived his life surrounded by both of these things, but he was still feeling the effects from the blow that had cracked his helmet.

All in all, though, Tal could still his condition had improved. It was easier to breathe, and his broken ribs felt like they were knitting back together. His back still burned uncomfortably, but Tal knew he'd taken a very bad hit to the back. Given enough time, he knew the pain would continue to ease as the bacta regenerated muscle and tissue. Tal's mind felt clearer still and it was easier to keep track of recent events.

He spied his determined little savior, sleeping in a plush chair next to the bed. She looked exhausted, with blackened half circles smudged under both her eyes. Tal decided to let her sleep. He knew that he was probably the cause of her exhaustion. He still wasn't sure he understood why she was so determined to save him. He'd given up on himself a good three months before he ever fell out of that gunship.

But, as he just lay there, propped up on his side by pillows, watching her, he noticed something else. She was very beautiful when she was sleeping. Tal studied her for a long while. Tal didn't know if he would ever have the opportunity to look at a pretty human female again once he was shipped back to his unit. So, Tal decided it might be best to study her as much as possible. So, Tal just lay there and watched her sleep. He tried to memorize every little detail of her features. After a long while, though, mundane matters intruded upon his pleasant gazing. Tal realized he was painfully thirsty again. He tried to ignore it. But, the more he tried to ignore it, the more it seemed to find a way to keep creeping back into his thoughts. Now he wasn't just thirsty, he was getting parched to the point of pain. There was a glass of water on a stand near the bed. Tal wondered if he get to it on his own. Tal extended his arm reaching toward the glass. No good. His reach was still short by several inches. Hmmm...maybe if he just sat up a little bit... then, that tantalizing glass filled with cool, refreshing relief would be reachable. Tal attempted to push himself upright into a sitting pushing using his broken hand, so that his good hand would be free to grasp the glass.

All in all, it was not a very good plan.

Tal yelped in pain and surprise when he put pressure on his hand. He'd forgotten just how badly he'd fractured that hand when he'd first been struck in the gunship. Tal's cry awakened his sleeping host.

"Tal! What's wrong?" Tess was immediately right by his side, concern evident in her features as she studied him.

"I'm OK," Tal said quickly, cradling his injured hand. He wasn't quite able to stifle a groan, and an accompanying grimace.

"Let me see it," Tess commanded firmly, Tal was reluctant to release his hand. Keeping his hand tightly cradled against his body was helping with the pain somewhat. "I'll wake up OneOne," Tess said, reaching over to tap on the droid.

"No, not the tinnie," Tal groaned, "medical tinnies are the worst!"

Tess put her hands on her hips, and looked at Tal sternly, "This 'medical tinnie' saved your life, Tal!"

"I shoot tinnies for a living, Tess," Tal said, eyeing the disactivated droid, warily.

Hearing her name roll of his tongue was her undoing. "OK, fine, I'll take care of it. You really have a thing against droids, then, huh?" Tess shook her head, "Alright, hang on, I'm going to get the medical scanner," Tess disappeared into the backroom and reappeared momentarily with an older model medical scanner. "OK, then, let's see what you've done to yourself." She took Tal's hand in hers, and began gently moving his fingers up and down. Tal bit down on his lip to keep from crying out. Tess looked up at his face, meeting his eyes. Tess peered at him, "It's OK to admit that something hurts, you know." Tal just looked away, not wanting to admit how much it hurt, especially when it had been his own fault. "Tal," Tess said. Tal kept his face turned away, reluctant to meet her gaze. "Tal," Tess called again, this time in a stronger tone of voice. Tal kept feeling her voice pulling him back. He tentatively turned his face back and met her gaze, "it's OK," she said, trying to reassure him with both her eyes and her tone of voice, "I can fix this."

"Are you mad?" Tal asked, quietly.

"Mad?" Tess looked surprised at this, "why would I be mad?"

Tal remained quiet.

"Tal," Tess prompted again, "why would I be mad?"

"On Kamino," Tal started out tenatively, "there were healers, female, Kaminoans, but they could get... angry... very angry... if you didn't follow all their instructions... to the letter."

Tal seemed lost for a moment in a memory. Tess continued to check Tal's hand over gently bending and flexing his fingers. Tal hissed when she hit a particularly tender spot.

"Sorry," Tess apologized, as she examined the movement of his ring finger carefully, "you have a particularly bad fracture on your hand leading into that finger."

Tal looked down at it, "Good thing it's not my shooting hand."

Tess looked a bit startled by that statement, but didn't comment. Tal didn't notice her reaction, he was still studying the damage to his hand, "Still, if it doesn't heal up properly, it's going to make it difficult to sight up on my rifle."

"Tal," Tess asked carefully, "how long have you been a soldier?"

"How long?" Tal repeated, surprised at the question, he turned his attention from his hand and looked at Tess, "I'm - I'm a clone, Tess. I was born to be a soldier."

Tess looked like she was trying to understand, "Yes, but, how long did you train to be a soldier? On Kamino? Did you say you were from Kamino?"

Tal nodded, "Yes, I'm from Kamino. How long? Well, I didn't start doing any live weapons fire training until I was two. So, with regards to the training that starts before then, I think it's mainly flash training and it starts in the pods-"

"Whoa! Back up! Say that last part again."

"Pods? Maturation happens in gestation chambers-"

"No, before that."

"Oh, well, flash training is the fastest method to assimiliate large amounts of data. Clones have eidemetic memories so we can-"

"Fascinating. We'll get back to that, but no, the part before that, Tal."

"Live weapons fire training?" Tal wasn't sure why Tess was suddenly so interested in his training.

"Yes, how old did you say you were? I didn't hear you correctly."

"Two," Tal answered simply.

"OK, I did hear you correctly. What in the three moons of Triluna were those Kaminoans thinking giving live weapons to two year olds?" Tess said, her voice rising with indignation.

Tal wanted to smile, she was very pretty when she was upset like this, and now she was upset on his behalf. This was getting to be a very interesting conversation.

"Well, technically, only our biological age was two," Tal supplied, "clones age rapidly. So, really, we were more like four or five."

Tess shook her head, and Tal could tell she was really getting worked up about this. To him, live weapons fire training was such a normal part of life. It was rather amusing to him that Tess was getting so stirred up on his behalf.

"Children!" Tess sputtered out, "they put live weapons in the hands of children."

"Well, not always," Tal clarified.

Tess looked at him, waiting for him to go on.

"Sometimes we didn't have any weapons," Tal explained, "and the Kaminoans just shot at us."

Tess looked like she might explode with fury.

"It was to test our reaction time," Tal explained, "they said it was to simulate real-life scenarios. You know, if we ran out of ammo."

Tess put her hands to her face.

"They said it wouldn't be the same in a simulation. You wouldn't get the same kinds of reactions. So, it was important to actually use live fire."

"Did anyone ever get hurt during these live fire exercises?" Tess asked.

"Yes," Tal responded, looking more subdued, "it's what seperated the clones who were going to make it, from well, the ones the Kaminoans considered," Tal grew much quieter, "... inferior."

Tess looked at him in horror, "And, what happened to those that were considered 'inferior'?"

Tal looked away for a moment, then finally met Tess' gaze, "Well, they didn't pass the test."

Tess thought this through, but finally she just had to ask, "And, by didn't pass you mean-"

Tal sighed, "Yes, it was live weapons fire, Tess. That's exactly what I mean."

Tears started running down Tess' face, "So, the same people who raised you, gunned down 4 and 5 year old children?"

"Well, technically we were two-" Tal clarified, but then seeing how upset Tess was, he stopped, realizing he wasn't handling this very well. Tess had hung her face down, and was no longer looking at him.

He realized then that his military ways were very different from Tess' civilian life. Had he done that? Had he made her cry? He tried to reach her face with his good hand, but couldn't. So, he reached out with his broken hand. It hurt, but at least he could get as far as her face. He touched her tears, grimacing as he did so, but glad he could finally touch her.

"I'm sorry, Tess," Tal said gently, as he touched her face. "I... didn't mean to do... this..." he wiped more of the tears away, grimacing, but feeling every brush of his fingers was worth it, "...cause you tears." His fingers continued to brush against her cheeks.

Tess lifted her face and looked up at him, "Tal, I'm not crying because of something you did. I'm crying because of something they did to you."

Tal just stared at her, absolutely stunned, as her words washed over him. His fingers resting against her cheeks, continued to get wet, as her tears, gently washed over him. He felt a cleansing begin to happen then, as her tears soaked into his skin.

Suddenly, it made sense to him now- why it wasn't amusing to her that two year olds were in live weapons training. It wasn't natural to her. It wasn't a natural part of her universe. Suddenly, it didn't seem so right to him either.

"Tal," Tess said softly, "I'm not Kaminoan. I'm Kalilean. Our ways are different. For as long as you are here, you won't... you... I... " Tess struggled for words, "just see yourself as someone very special and unique, OK?"

"I'm a _clone_, Tess."

Tess sighed, "No, Tal, you are a sum of your parts, as my Dad used to say. Right now, you are a product of the training you were given. Just as I've been trained to run a farm. But, I see myself as so much more than just a farmer. Truth be told, I don't even like farming. I just happened to be born on a farming planet. You just happened to be born in a gestation tank on a clone planet. But inside, Tal, you are so much more than that."

Tal cocked his head again to the side, considering her. She was unlike anyone he'd ever met before, "No, you're not like the Kaminoans, at all," Tal said, quietly.

He gazed at her steadily, still trying to figure her out.

"OK, come on, we need to get this hand fixed," Tess said. He was still deep in thought when Tess went back to her examination of his hand. She ran several more scans. "It's not too bad, considering. We need to reset this one finger, but everything else is fine. There's some signs of increased inflammation, but I can give you an anti-inflammatory for that."

She reached down, and pulled up a sturdy satchel from beside the bed. Tal recognized the lettering on it, as the kind carried by a medic, or someone that worked in the medical field. Cooper had carried a kit with markings like that. Seeing the symbols gave Tal a pang in his gut, as he once again felt the loss of his dearest friend. Cooper went everywhere with that bag, and had saved many, many lives with it. The bag was lost on Agamar, left behind, with Cooper.

Tal stared at this medical bag. It was well-worn, made of sturdy leather, and looked like it had been used many times over the course of many years. Tal thought that perhaps if Cooper had been an old-country doctor, he would have carried just such a bag. As Tal watched Tess work, he wondered what Cooper would have thought of Tess. He was sure the two would have gotten along. He could just picture the two of them chatting away about some folk remedy or another, or about what a bonehead he was for reinjuring part of his hand again.

"Hang on, let me check my Dad's notes," Tess' voice interrupted Tal's musings.

Tess set her data reader down, and pulled a much older model data reader out of the old leather satchel. The old data reader was chunky, and not so elegant as the thin, sleek, full-color data readers that were popular these days. Tess chewed her lip as she searched through data. The yellow glow from the old-style, single-color screen cast a golden tint to Tess' skin. Tal found himself just staring at her lip, as she chewed on it.

Tess finally looked up, and noticed Tal staring at her. "What?" she said. "am I taking too long?"

Tal looked away quickly, embarrassed. He tried to think of something to say, but all he could come up with was: "Uhhhhh...", his mind was a complete blank. All he could think about was the way she was biting her lip. Her teeth were white and very straight. Her lips looked soft.

"Sorry, all this medical stuff is always so interesting," Tess said. Tal looked at her blankly. Huh? Was she talking? Oh, yes. She was talking. What were they talking about? Probably not her lips and teeth. Something about stuff?

"I lose track of time when I'm reading," Tess continued, "Dad always said it was both my best and worst quality," Tess switched the reader off and carefully set it back into the satchel. "OK, Dad says... well, Dad's notes say an anti-inflammatory will fix this right up," Tess poked her head inside the bag, rummaging around, "I enjoy reading," Tess said, conversationally, with her head still stuck in the bag, "That's the part of me that's positive I was not destined to be an eopie farmer…. Ah hah!" She pulled her head out of the bag, and emerged with a syringe. Tess double-checked the label, while Tal eyed the needle warily. Tess noticed his expression, "I'm going to give you something right away to help with the pain and swelling, and then I'm going to reset that finger," Tal was still giving her a look as he eyed the needle, "Tal, it's just an anti-inflammatory."

"It's a _needle_," Tal countered.

Tess merely laughed, and shook her head. Tal liked that she laughed so easily. But, then again, in this case, she was not the one who was one the receiving end of the big needle. She rested his injured hand down onto her thigh, and then used both hands to administer the injection. She held his hand in place with one hand, and then slid the needle under the cast. Tal gritted his teeth to avoid making a sound as the needle punctured over-sensitive nerves. She pulled the needle back out, and Tal breathed a sigh of relief.

"I'm sorry if that hurt," she said, setting the needle aside.

"It's OK," Tal said, "it's my own fault."

Tess just shook her head, but she had a mysterious smile.

"What?" Tal questioned, sensing there was more to the smile.

Tess shook her head again, "No, it's just I was thinking that maybe you and I aren't so different, after all."

Tal watched her, just waiting patiently for her to continue. Tess reached back into the satchel for a finger splint, and fracture wrap. "OK, I'm going to re-do your cast a little bit to protect this one finger better. I should have done this in the first place," Tal watched her work, noticing she had a very gentle touch. He liked her much better than the medical droid. Much better. She smelled so much better, and he liked the way her body brushed up against his when she got so close to him and- Tal noticed she was talking. Right. He should be listening, not thinking about her body. Sigh. Such a pretty body, too.

"-she wasn't always sick. Back when my mother was healthy, she had the energy to be both bossy and nice. There were times when she was all loving and everything was perfect. And, then, gheesh, that woman could lay a guilt trip on you like nobody's business. Do something wrong and she would not let you forget it. I was a curious child, and tended to injury myself through my own, well, I guess you could call it, folly. My Dad would just laugh it off, say kids will be kids, and patch me back up again. But, my Mom, she always had this double-edged sword approach. Initially, she'd comfort me, dry my tears. Then, blam! She could not stop reminding me of how my getting injured was my own fault. The woman was relentless, at times," Tess shook her head, her tone a mixed one, of bewilderment, amusement, and a touch of sadness. Tal just looked at her intently, listening to it all, his eyes big and brown, with compassionate understanding. Tess looked at him, and a tear trickled down her face. "Goodness! Look at me! I'm being absolutely ridicilous! One moment, we're talking about your Kaminoans, and then the next moment we're dreadging up the ghosts of my past! What has gotten into me?" Tess quickly finished putting the supplies away and closed the satchel.

Tal reached out, and stopped her, holding her hand with his, "Stay, Tess."

Tess looked at him, a tear eking out the corner of her eye, "Anyone ever tell you that you're a good listener?"

Tal went to shake his head, thought better of it, then simply answered, "No."

Tess began to gently massage his other fingers- the only part of the hand sticking out from his cast. "This will keep the swelling down," Tess said softly.

"Tell me more about your family?" Tal asked, he coughed, and had to swallow hard, because his throat was so dry. Tess picked up on it.

"Tal, you need water?" Tess asked.

"Yes!" Tal said, his voice sounding loud, even to his own ears.

Tess looked at the glass, and then back at Tal. "Hang on, I never even asked how this happened?"

"I was trying to get the water," Tal admitted, a bit sheepishly.

"Tal! I would have gotten it for you!" Tess protested, "why didn't you call me?"

Tal met her eyes, and tried to look apologetic, "But, I didn't want to wake you up. You looked so tired."

"That bad, huh?" Tess said, with a little laugh.

"No, I meant-" Tal was instantly concerned he'd offended her.

Tess laughed, "Relax, Tal," she reached up and playfully ruffled his hair, "How about I get you that drink now?"

Tal didn't want to risk saying the wrong thing, so he just nodded. His scalp tingled a little where she'd just ruffled his hair. Tal wasn't used to someone touching him in such a familiar manner. He only touched his brothers during training, arm wrestling, or carrying them off the battlefield. He certainly never ruffled a brother's hair. He looked at her in confusion, trying to sort out all these new tactile sensations. But, if she noticed his confusion, she didn't say anything. Tal was still trying to get the image of a brother ruffling another brother out of his head, when suddenly she was there at his side. She lifted Tal's head, and cradled him against her chest. Tal took several sips, immensely relieved to finally get his long awaited drink of water. Then, Tal decided to drink _more._ OK, granted he wasn't all that thirsty anymore, but there was still some water in the glass and this was just such a great method of drinking water.

"You're still thirsty?" Tess said in surprise, as Tal continued to drink.

Tal nodded his head, mid-sip, feeling the top of his head bump into her chest as he did so. He knew he should feel ashamed for his actions, but he just felt giddy instead. He would have grinned, but was worried water might have escaped his mouth if he did so. So, he just continued to drink until he'd drained everything out of the cup. Tess settled him back on the pillow. Tal knew he'd never want to some medical droid to impersonally give him water through a tube again. Tal struggled to think of something to say, so that she'd stay with him a bit longer.

"You're good at this," Tal said. It was all his brain could come up with, and considering all the images and sensations he was processing, he thought even coming up with that was pretty good.

"Yeah, well, my mother was sick for a long time, and she was _not _the easiest patient," Tess said, her voice a mixture of a self-deprecating laugh, and a groan that spoke volumes.

"I'm… sorry about your loss," Tal said, struggling to recall his brief flashing training that covered good manners and etiquette.

"Well, that was a long time ago now, Mom's been gone several years now," Tess said, quietly, looking off into the back of the house as if gazing back toward distant memories, "that was hard. But, harder still was losing my Dad. I managed the farm OK when it was just him and me. Mom and I didn't always get along, but Dad loved her in all her moods. He was just devastated when she died. As sick as she was for so long, he was still crazy about her. I always thought my Dad was so strong- that he would live forever. But, after Mom died, somehow the fighting spirit went out of him," Tess' voice was hollow, like speaking to the ghosts of her past, trying to understand what had happened. "He was always so tough. But, then, he just seemed to get frailer and frailer. One day, he just didn't wake up," her voice broke on the last word, her bottom lip trembling.

Whoa, is she crying _again_? Tal stared at Tess, trying to think of an appropriate response. He knew exactly what to do when someone was trying to kill him. But, when someone was crying in front of him? Well, this was much more difficult.

"Tess," Tal said softly, and somehow that one word just seemed to open up a floodgate of emotion. Tess dropped to her knees beside Tal's sofabed. She buried her face into the sodabed side and just cried. Unsure what to do, Tal just patted her shoulder, and said: "Tess." She continued to cry, despite Tal's shoulder patting. Her hair was right there, within his easy reach. Tal decided perhaps now would be a good time to touch that. He reached out with his good hand, and began stroking her hair. He knew that when she'd massaged him it always felt soothing. He felt better afterwards. Maybe the reverse was true and it would have the same effect on her. "Uh, there, there," he said awkwardly, and then added in, "Tess," He continued to run his hands down her hair, and then searched out some of those trigger points that she'd used on him earlier. He massaged the base of her skull, moved on to the top of the scalp, and then reached his hands around to gently massage her face. He was so intent on what he was doing, he didn't realize at first that she had stopped crying. He stopped, too, wondering if he'd someone crossed a boundary and was doing something wrong. But, then Tess pressed her face into his hands, edging him on. He realized that she liked what he was doing. With renewed confidence, he began exploring the planes of her face, gently stroking and massaging. He heard her moan. He froze. Had he hurt her? Again, she pressed her face back into his hands. Tal guessed perhaps that was a good sound. He continued stroking and massaging everyplace he could reach on her face and scalp.

Eventually, Tess lifted her face and looked up at him. She smiled at him, and Tal realized he'd never seen a smile quite like it before. She reminded him of a sunrise he'd seen on Agamar the day before Cooper had disappeared. So beautifully breathtaking that it was hard to put into actual words.

They just stared at each other for a long moment. What was Tal supposed to do now? He had absolutely no idea. They both looked away after a long moment.

"I should let you rest," Tess said, standing up, slowly, giving him one last tentative smile, "I'm going to go check on the herd."

Of course. The shabla herd.

With that, she walked away, retrieving her coat off its' customary peg by the door. Tal watched her slip her feet into her barn boots, and disappear out the door, leaving him alone once again.

# # #


	3. Chapter 3 Heating Up

"**Left Behind"**

**Chapter 3**

The following morning, Tal was feeling even better. And, he was starting to get even more restless.

"OK, last bite," Tess said, spooning the last of the broth into his mouth. Tal sighed, trying to remain patient as she wiped the sides of his face. He was getting tired of being fed. A clone had his pride, after all.

"I have to go," Tess said, quickly heading to the kitchen, and dropping the bowl into the sink. She didn't even take the time to wash it. She seemed in an unusual hurry this morning. didn't even take the time to wash the bowl. Tal would gladly have washed the bowl, if he just could have gotten up. He would have gladly have done just about anything right about now. Tal watched, feeling mounting frustration as he watched Tess hastily prepared to leave. Why did she always have to leave so much? Time passed so slowly when she was gone. He was miserable being here alone without her. Didn't she know how awful it was trying to pass the time without her? Why couldn't he go see the shabla eopies? She shoved her feet into her boots, and grabbed her coat. She was still buttoning her coat, as she rushed out the door. "A storm is supposed to roll in today. I'm trying to get everything done before it hits," she hastily explained, not even looking up at Tal. Tal could tell her mind was on the eopie herd, and not on him. Without another word, she pulled open the door and disappeared outside. Tal got a good blast of fresh, cold air when the door opened. The cold air seemed so appealing, and right now outside seemed so much more desirable than being inside. He longed to just get up out of bed. His body ached from just being in the same position too long. Tal was absolutely, positively miserable.

He tried pushing himself to a sitting position. His ever-watchful droid keeper extended a sensor arm, took readings, and then poked him with another arm.

"-ooper -al, your injuries -re not sufficiently healed. -emain at rest."

Tal was tired of remaining at rest.

He'd been injured before, more times than he'd care to remember, but his recovery times had always been relatively quick. Tal's current surroundings weren't nearly as high-tech as he was accustomed, lacking the Republic's ultra-modern technology to quickly heal battle-injured clones and get them back on the job. Tal's recovery was taking much longer than he was accustomed. Tal looked at the door where Tess had just left. No, not left. She had _abandoned_ him in favor of the eopies. Tal decided he hated those eopies, and he hadn't even met them yet.

Tal was so restless and bored today that he couldn't even count the ceiling beams. That might have sufficed for entertainment on the other days, but he had too much bundled up energy today.

His body was not built for long periods of sitting around. He was built for bursts of speed and sustained activity. This sitting around and inactivity was no sort of life for a clone. Tal could feel himself becoming increasingly restless as the morning dragged on. Tal strained to hear any sound at all of the military presence on the planet. After all, if Tess lived close enough to the battle zone that she ended up with _him_, shouldn't he be hearing gunships, tanks, or at least the distant sounds of munitions? He hadn't heard a _single_ larty flying by overhead since waking up here. That alone was starting to frighten him. Where were the gunships?

If only he hadn't lost his helmet... He was finding it increasingly disorienting to spend his days without his helmet. His helmet always provided him with an endless supply of data, communications, access to the outside world. With his helmet, he could find out where the battle was, where his unit was, and find out when he was going to be picked up.

Yes, helmet. He needed his helmet. He knew he'd broken it. But maybe he could fix it. He was very good with repairing things. He excelled at that while at Kamino. Sometimes late at night, he'd even allowed himself to think of being in an engineering division, rather than just an ordinary combat division. But, then he'd squash any such thinking, because you went where the Kaminoans placed you. It was very bad to question their decisions in matters like that. Very bad. The Kaminoans didn't like that at all.

Tal pushed thoughts of the Kaminoans away. Those memories always left him feeling rather queasy. So he compartmentalized those thoughts back away. He went back to thinking about how he could possibly get his helmet back, and find out where the battle was, where the rest of his unit was, and find out when he was going to be picked up. Of course they were coming to pick him up…he had _not _been left behind. No, not him. He was not that guy. The one who just got left. Tal's restless musings were suddenly interrupted by OneOne.

"-ooper -al, would -ou like to urinate?" the droid waved the urinal enthusiastically up and down right in Tal's face.

The droid's sudden appearance startled him.

"Get that things out of my face!" Tal snapped, irritably, thoroughly annoyed that even the malfunctioning medical droid had managed to sneak up on him.

The droid leaned in and began taking multiple sensor readings, "-ooper -al, according to my -ensor readings, -our bladder is -ull."

"Stop reading my bladder!" Tal shouted irritably at the droid, pushing the droids sensor's arms away from his groin area.

"It is -ime to urinate -ooper -al!" the droid insisted, waving the urinal in Tal's face.

Tal grabbed the urinal, out of OneOne's grasp, and flung it across the room, "Enough, OneOne! I'm not pissing in that tincan!"

The urinal landed with a satisfying clatter on the farside of the room. In a fit of rebellion, Tal threw the covers off himself. He discovered he was completely naked, other than the many parts of him that were covered in bandages. He should have realized that before, since he'd been using the urinal now for a while. But, with the covers over him, he just hadn't made the connection.

"Find me pants!" he ordered the droid.

"I -ill have -o consult owner Tess," said the droid, heading for the intercom system.

"No! No consultations!" Tal said forcefully, "just find me pants! That's an order!"

The droid stopped, swiveling his dome to regard Tal.

"Pants, One One Two One-whatever your designation is! NOW!" Tal ordered, pointing imperiously toward the backrooms where he always saw Tess getting the supplies.

The droid hesitated, and then must have decided that Tal had sufficient authority to give him orders. It tottled off on its' noisy servos toward one of the bedrooms.

Tal slowly pushed himself to a sitting position, pleased to find that it didn't feel nearly as awful as on his previous attempt.

He could feel the skin on his back pulling and stretching, but it didn't tear. His ribs ached, but they were definitely getting better. He had the genetics to heal quickly, and with all the rest he'd been getting, his body had done a lot of healing. Tal heard One One returning. The droid had found a pair simple brown work pants, with drawstring waists, and lots of pockets. Perfect for working on a farm, and also easy for Tal to get on his condition.

"Excellent!" Tal said, accepting the pants from One One, "you have done well," feeling a bit weird offering up praise to a droid.

Tal wondered who these pants belonged to, and if Tess minded if he borrowed them. She'd talked a lot about family members who'd passed away. If these had belonged to them, well, hopefully she wouldn't mind Tal borrowing a pair. He didn't think had quite the flexibility to get into his bodysuit yet. Tal tried to bend over to put the pants on, and immediately felt his ribs loudly protesting the movement. He held the pants out to One One, "Help me get these on." Belatedly, he added: "If you would, uh, OneOne."

He wasn't sure what etiquette he should use with this droid, but figured it was better to stay on the droid's good side. The droid held the pants out at the right height, so that Tal could easily step into them. Tal stood up, keeping a bracing hand on One One. He drew the pants tight around his waist. He stood still for a moment, adjusting to being upright again. He felt very triumphant, just to be standing. Tal was amazed that along with his other injuries he hadn't broken or injured any bones in his legs. But, his legs were indeed undamaged.

With OneOne's help, Tal slowly made it over to the refresher. He was shaking and exhausted by the time he got there. He had to stay sitting on the refresher for several long minutes, shaking in exhaustion, before he even had the strength to urinate.

"-ooper -al, do you -eed help urinating?" OneOne asked critically, watching him from the entrance to the refresher.

Tal shook his head, and sighed, before responding to the droid, "No, OneOne. I don't need help. I'm just resting."

"-he -efresher is not -or resting. It is for for urinating," OneOne pointed out.

Tal got up on shaky legs, pushed the droid out of the room, and locked the door.

# # #

Afterwards, Tal was so tired he fell asleep face down on top of his covers.

Tess slipped in the front door, removing her coat and boots quietly in case Tal was asleep. She liked watching him sleep. She knew sleep was the best thing for him now while his body was still healing. She was cold, wet and tired from the day's drenching rains, but wanted to get her "Tal fix" before getting changed. She turned toward Tal's bed, and stopped, surprised. He was dressed. Well, partially. He was wearing a pair of her dad's trademark brown workpants. Her dad must've had at least of a dozen of those pants. He wouldn't wear anything else. Tess hadn't been able to part with them when her dad had passed on. They'd been his absolute favorite. Whoa. Her dad had never looked like this in them, though. The thick brown workpants clung to Tal's muscular thighs, outlining just how well built he was. Tess hadn't gotten that good a look at him during that frantic first night when she and OneOne had been addressing his life-threatening injuries. Wow. The man was beautiful. And, his... thank goodness he was sleeping. Tess sank down into her customary chair, even though her clothes were still damp. She really should get changed first to avoid getting the chair wet. But, his... his glorious ass. There was no other word for it. She put her one fist to her mouth, and gazed at it in unabased appreciation. Dirk _was_ an absolute ass. No doubt about it. He thought he had a great body. He had _nothing_ compared to Tal. Tal _had _a great ass. It filled out those brown pants like they had been customized created just to frame that testament to great-

"Oh, hey," Tal muttered sleepily, "hi Tess." He opened his eyes, smiling at her. "You're back."

He reached his hand out toward her. His hand was warm, and Tess immediately took it in her own, "Your hands are cold," he murmured, still sleepy, then he looked up to her hair, "you're wet." He glanced toward the windows, "is it still raining?"

"Yeah," Tess said, "been coming down all day."

Tal went to push himself to a sitting up position. Tess immediately leaned in, grabbing on to him, helping gently pull him up. She was going to pull away, put Tal tugged on her.

"Stay," he said softly, pushing her down to a position sitting next to him on the bed.

Tess did, because it felt more natural to stay than to go. Tal pulled her hands into his, rubbing them and warming them.

Tess leaned into him, absorbing some of the warmth coming off of him, "Thanks, that feels really nice."

"You're really chilled," Tal said, slipping his arm around her. His arm just seemed to do it of its' own accord. It felt so natural to do so. Tess sighed happily, as she leaned up against his shoulder. She put one hand on his brown pants leg.

"These are new," she teased gently.

"I hope it's OK," he said, "OneOne retrieved them for me out of one of the backrooms."

Tess nodded, her head brushing up against his shoulder, "Yes, of course. They belonged to my father," she said, confirming what Tal had guessed, "he would've liked seeing them go to good use." She ran her hand idly down Tal's thigh, "besides, they look good on you."

Tal sucked in his breath.

Tess froze, and looked up at him in concern, "I'm sorry, Tal, did I hurt you?"

"No," Tal said, in a strangled voice, "not at all. I'm just fine, Tess, really."

She peered into his face, concerned, "Your face looks flushed, Tal. You're not running a fever, are you?" She quickly put her hand up to his forehead, and in the process, her breasts brushed up against his bare chest. Tal sucked in his breath again.

Tess looked at him again, "I need to let you, rest, Tal."

"No!" Tal protested.

But, Tess was already slipping out from under his arm. "I'm going to take a shower. Slip out of these wet clothes."

Tal groaned quietly to himself.

"Are you sure you're alright, Tal?" Tess reached her hand up to his forehead again. "Can I get you anything before I slip into the shower? A glass of water, maybe?"

Tal groaned again. Then, he shook his head, and carefully lay back down, and as soon as Tess was out of sight, Tal pulled the pillow over his head, and moaned in frustration. He tried to avoid thinking of everything that just happened, but the moment he heard the water in the refresher come on, all he could think about was Tess.

# # #


	4. Chapter 4 The Present

**"Left Behind"**

**Chapter 4**

New blood joins this earth

And quickly he's subdued

Through constant pained disgrace

The young boy learns their rules

** -** The Unforgiven, Metallica

Tal slept very fitfully. He now had a new sort of discomfort to contend with. His body seemed to be healing just fine, and his keen senses were returning. Almost too much. He now seemed to be hyperaware of Tess' when she was around. He was very aware of when she touched his skin to check his bandages. His skin seemed to tingle in the wake of her touch. He was aware of her scent, and it made him wonder how he smelled. He was sure he smelled terrible after just lying in bed all this time. He'd have to ask Tess about taking a shower. He was sure he could stand long enough to shower now. He certainly didn't want the droid in the shower with him. And, even the mere thought of Tess in the shower with him helping him bathe was instantly overwhelming. He tried to think of something technical and difficult, like an extra engineering class he'd taken at Kamino, since he liked techie stuff. He was supposed to have gotten a special certification that would have entitled him to a promotion, but then all hell broke loose, and they were all deployed early by the Jedi to Geonosis, and none of it ever came to fruition. Still, it calmed him during difficult times, thinking of all those extra engineering steps. He ran through them in his mind now. Yes, much better than other matters, such as thinking about calibrating my... No! No! Blast it! He rolled over in bed, trying to adjust the sheets to hide his painful erection. More and more, he found himself spending an inordinate amount of time thinking about Tess, when he should be thinking about other things, like getting back to his unit.

Clones who didn't report for duty were shot. It wasn't officially written down anywhere, of course. But, Tal knew it as well as any clone. He knew what would happen to him if he didn't go back. He knew the stories... the stories were clone legend now... it all started two years ago... First, there were stories of brothers were quietly slipping away and leaving the GAR. Wow! Leave the GAR! After all, clones learned extremely quickly. Clones were smarter and stronger than average humans. It seemed there were unlimited possibilities with regards to other jobs, then... There were rumors that clones were not sterile, after all, either, as originally thought. Soon, there were whispered conversations in every AT-AT, every bunker, every barrack, all the brothers were quietly discussing the concept of "life outside the GAR." What had seemed so mind-boggling at Kamino didn't seem so crazy any longer. Why couldn't clones hold the same jobs as other men, especially if we were smarter and stronger? And, _fertile_? Shouldn't we be able to plough our seed, too? It was very shortly after this that the dark rumors began... furtive whispers of brothers shooting brothers... specially-trained ARCs tracking down and taking out the deserters. Clones who left the army were not brought back. They were not given a second chance. The message was clear. The only way to leave the GAR was in a body bag. The conversations about "life outside the GAR" quieted down and became the stuff of fantasy again, replaced one again by talk of bolo scores, and Twilek girls.

Tal lay awake in the middle of the night, just staring into the darkness. Would that be so bad? Every friend he'd ever had was already dead. Could they really still hold this over his head as a threat anymore? The dark ARCs? The mysterious black-armored brothers who came in the dead of night and took out other brothers?

Well, whether he cared or not, there was still this part of Tal that just felt a sense of _duty_. He couldn't explain it logically. It was just this thing that was deeply embedded and manifested inside of him. It kept him going, past all sane and rational point. He was a soldier. It was his duty to go back. He had to get his helmet back, restore communications, call in, and arrange to be picked up. That's all. Simple. Logical. He'd ask Tess about the rest of his kit. He vaguely remembered he had at least some of it with him when he arrived. Having arrived at a plan, he tried to settle his mind down and go back to sleep. But, sleep was a long time in coming. When he thought of leaving, he felt this odd pang that he couldn't explain at all.

# # #

When he awoke, morning light was peeking through the windows. He looked toward the kitchen, hoping to see Tess in the kitchen drinking her customary cup of morning tea. But, the kitchen was empty. Tal squelched a feeling of disappointment. He glanced around the house, hoping she was still around. But, the house was empty, except for the droid. Tal could see from the indicator light on the droid that it had been switched on. He caught sight of a flimsi note on the small table next to his bedside.

_Had to get an early start. Hopefully you can manage this on your own. I might be late. OneOne is activated, should you need anything. - Tess._

There was a generous plate full of dried fruit, and several bottles of water on the table. Tal just stared at it for a long time, as if by staring alone he could make it go away and conjure up Tess instead. After a while, he sighed. Yesterday, he was grumbling because Tess was still feeding him. Today, he was unhappy because Tess _wasn't_ there to feed him. He slowly pushed himself to a seated position, and grabbed one of the bottles of water. As he stared out the window, he noticed another storm was rolling in. Tess would be working out in the rain again. This bothered him, for reasons he couldn't quite figure out. Even though _he_ worked out in all manner of inclement weather, it was different when it was Tess.

After he finished the water, he reached for the plate of fruit, being careful of his ribs. He chewed the fruit slowly, appreciating the sour, tangy taste. He guessed that this must be the same purplish fruit he would see hanging from trees all over the planet. He would often take refuge behind these trees, during the constant engagement with the Separatists. The trees had very thick trunks, and made for good cover. He hadn't realized they also made for such good eating. He actually felt a bit bad now for how many of the trees he'd inadvertently destroyed.

After breakfast, he asked OneOne to help him to the refresher. He was even civil to the droid, which he considered an accomplishment. Out of boredom, more than anything, he lay back down and slept for several more hours. Eventually, his body just couldn't sleep anymore. So, he spent the rest of the afternoon just staring out the window at the rain. He wondered about his unit, and how they were faring with all this rain. He thought about the different times he and Cooper had taken shelter in rocky outcroppings and burnt-out buildings. As they waited for bad weather to pass, they'd just talk about anything and everything. Tal missed those long talks with Cooper. Tal looked around the farmhouse room, and sighed. Cooper had wanted something like this. This was Cooper's dream. He wanted more than just being a medic all his life. He wanted a family one day. Tal had told him that such a thing was impossible. Clones didn't have families, outside of their brothers. But, Cooper didn't buy into the threat of the "black ARCs" the way Tal did. Cooper refused to accept it. He told Tal that nothing was impossible, and that after the war was over, he was going to have a family. Tal just shook his head and laughed at him, calling him crazy. Cooper looked at him, a little sadly then, and asked Tal what he thought was going to happen to them. Tal just shrugged, and said: "Just more of the same, Coop. Just this. Fighting. Soldiering. A meal at the end of the day. And, that's it. That is all there for us."

"And, then?" Cooper had prompted.

"And, then, what?" Tal looked at him, in confusion.

"What are we going to do, after we're done doing this, Tal?"

"We won't be doing anything, Coop! We'll be dead! There is nothing else for us! We fight, and we die, that's all there is for us," Tal insisted, "to think any different is..." Tal put up his hands, not having the words to verbalize, "is...", finally, he came up with, "...hopeless. There is no future for any of us clones!"

Tal had never forgotten the sad look Cooper had given him, "You have no hope for any kind of future, then, brother? None?"

"We're clones, Coop! We don't have futures!" Tal was starting to get annoyed with Cooper, for his inability to understand to come to grips with the reality of their existence.

"So, what do you live for then, Tal?" Cooper asked, in his maddeningly calm way.

Tal stared at Cooper, the question making him uncomfortable, "I don't know, Coop!" Tal sighed, in exasperation, wishing they could talk about something else. This topic was giving him a headache, "I've never given the matter that much thought. Can we talk about engineering stress points instead? Come on, you like talking about engineering. Let's talk about that, instead."

"No, Tal. We're talking about this. If you have no hope for any kind of future, then what is it that makes you duck when they say 'Incoming?' Why don't you just step in the path of the next incoming blast? Wouldn't that make more sense?"

Tal just stared at Cooper, as if he'd gone mad, "No, that makes no sense at all! Coop, that would be-"

"Suicide," Cooper finished for him, "that's what people who have no hope for the future do. But, you don't do that, then, well, so why is it that you don't do that?" Cooper wasn't being sarcastic. He was still using his normal calm-Cooper voice, like he did when he was trying to get Tal to realize something important. But, Tal wasn't having any part of it today.

"I don't know!" Tal shouted, now getting truly annoyed with Cooper, "maybe it's just because I've been trained to duck! Maybe it's because I've been trained to do this stuff from the moment I became coherent and aware in the gestation pod. Or, maybe it's just instinct. Something they drilled into us clones, or genetically-coded into us, or something, so we react automatically. Like following orders. They tell us to pull the trigger, and we pull it automatically. Boom. No thinking required. It's all just shabla training, and instinct. We're just clones, Coop. Nothing more. You expect too much of us sometimes, brother."

"And, you expect too little, Tal. As smart as you are. You would have been a combat engineer if not for Geonosis. You know that," Cooper said, shaking his head, "I think it's more than that. I think there's a part of you, Tal, that wants more out of this life. Just like I do. You just haven't come to terms with it, yet."

"What's there to get, Coop? There _is _nothing for us!" Tal stood up quickly, cursing as his head bashed on the low ceiling of the outcropping where'd they taken shelter.

"Watch that, low ceiling," Cooper quipped.

"Hah, you're funny," Tal responded, sarcastically. He stalked out into the rain.

"Hey! Where you going?" Cooper called after him.

"Away!" Tal yelled over his shoulder, "away from you, and your crazy ideas!" Tal stopped then, and turned to face Cooper, "if anyone is going to get themselves killed, it's _you_, Coop. You've got your head so filled with these crazy ideas, you won't even _notice_ when something is_ Incoming_! There _is_ no future, Coop. _This_ is all there is for us," Tal spread his arms wide as the rain beat down on him, "We don't get any more than this. I don't know why you don't just get that!"

Tal will never forget the hurt look Cooper gave him then. He couldn't bear it, so he just left Cooper there, and found someplace else to wait out the rain. When he saw Cooper again, they didn't speak of it. Just three weeks later, they were deployed to Agamar.

Tal watched the fat droplets of rain bead up on the farmhouse window before snaking down to the bottom. Cooper was the one who wanted a future. Tal looked around the warm, welcoming farmhouse room again. He was the one who wanted to survive the war. Why was Tal here instead? Why had Tal survived? It wasn't right. The universe just wasn't fair. Cooper was the good one, not him. He was the one who was always going around saving lives - the one everybody liked. Yet, they still left Cooper behind on Agamar.

Tal squeezed his eyes shut. When he opened them again, he felt something hot and wet eking out the corner of his eyes. He put his fingers up to the corner of his eyes. Tears? He quickly wiped them away. More appeared in their place. Clones didn't cry. Did they? The tears continued to eek out, and after a while, Tal gave up trying to wipe them away. Fine. Maybe clones did cry. But, just this once.

# # #

Tal awoke when he heard the sound of the door opening. Instinctively, he reached for his blaster. It wasn't there. He'd have to talk to Tess about getting his blaster back.

Tess walked in, soaked, and exhausted-looking. Tal looked out the window. It was already early evening. Tal didn't even remember falling asleep.

"Hey," she said, looking over to Tal. "I'm going to get changed, and then I'll fix you something to eat." She was carrying a small bundle under one arm.

Tal felt bad that exhausted as she was, she had to wait on him. It didn't seem right. He felt like he did when he was with Cooper. Always the weaker one in the bunch.

"Can I prepare the rations, Tess?" he offered, pushing himself to a sitting position. He had no idea how to do such a thing. But, she looked like she needed rest. Maybe with some clone ingenuity, he could figure out prepared food in a civilian kitchen.

Tess smiled at him, "No, Tal. Maybe in a few days. I don't think you should be up and about yet."

Tal's disappointment must have showed on his face, because Tess came right over to him. "Hey, there, now, come on, I know this is hard. But, look, I brought you something."

"You did?" Tal looked at the cloth bag in confusion. No one had ever given him anything before.

"Uh, well, don't get too excited, it actually belongs to you," Tess said, as she handed him the bag, then she looked uncertain, "maybe you don't even want it back, I don't know..."

Tal's face lit up, and he reached for the bag. Tess smiled at his enthusiasm, handing it over. Tal hefted the cloth bag, noted its' shape. Even without opening it, he exclaimed: "My helmet! Tess, you brought me my helmet!"

Tess smiled at his enthusiasm, "Oh, good, you did want it back then," then she looked uncertain then, "Tal, it's damaged. Badly. I hope you're not disappointed."

Tal fumbled with the drawstring one-handed, trying to tuck the bag under one arm so he could open the bag with the other. Tess reached over and opened the bag for him, "I broke my hand once," she said, smoothly, understandingly, "I remember what a pain it was trying to do everything with just the one hand." Tal shot her a grateful look, trying not to be affected by the close-proximity of her as she leaned in so close to him. He tried to resist the temptation to breathe in her scent, but she was just so close. He inhaled, forgetting temporarily about the helmet. Ah, an earthy scent he'd come to uniquely associate with Tess.

"-with that crack down the back, I was not sure if it was worth bringing it back. But, I figure I'd check with you anyway."

Wait, Tess was talking to him. Tal turned his attention to listening to what Tess was saying.

"Uh, no, this is great. Thanks, Tess," Tal said, trying to pick up on the conversation. He tried to slide the helmet out of the bag, but also found it difficult one-handed. The wet cloth bag clung to the helmet. Tal tried to wedge the bag under his injured arm, to hold it still, so he could get his helmet out. Tess leaned in again to help. OK, perhaps he could have managed to get it out if he'd kept trying, but being that Tess was so close-by and seemed so inclined to help...

"Here, let me get that for you," Tess said, leaning right over him again. Tal did his best to hide his smile as her body brushed right up against his. Tal decided he liked presents.

Tess finished working the helmet out of the bag, and presented it to Tal, "Well, here it is," she said, almost shyly.

"Thank you," Tal said, with utmost sincerity, accepting it from Tess. He wasn't looking at the helmet, so much as he was looking at Tess. Both her hair and her clothes were plastered to her skin, and she had deep lines under her eyes. Tal still thought she looked absolutely beautiful. He smiled at her, "It was very kind of you, Tess, to bring this back for me."

Tess smiled at him, happily, the smile completely lighting up her features, "Well, I'm glad then," she looked down at the helmet and then frowned, "I just wish it was in better condition."

Tal finally took a look at the helmet. It was worse than he thought it would be, but not as bad as in the vivid dreams that plagued him. There was an enormous crack starting at the top, and running all the way down the back, almost cleaving the helmet in two. Tal held up one hand to the back of his head, running his hand over the area that was still tender over a week, (was it longer, he wondered?), since he fell from the larty.

He felt Tess place her hand gently on top of his, touching the back of his head. He looked up at her.

"It's amazing you survived a blow to the head like this," Tess said, quietly, almost reverently. They both looked down at the helmet again. Tal's hand dropped from the back of his head, down onto his broken helmet. But, Tess' hand stayed up there, and began gently playing with his hair again. Tal wondered if she realized she was doing it. She seemed to enjoy playing with hair.

"Does it bother you, when I do this?" Tess asked, after a moment, her fingers curling around his ear.

Tal looked back up at her, their gazes holding for a moment. He shook his head.

"Good, because it's good for circulation," Tess murmured, her fingers still wandering around, "speeds healing."

Tal smiled, his attention on his helmet. He turned it every which way, inspecting it, but for just a moment he had the playful smile of a man who thought a woman might find him a bit attractive, too.

"What?" she said, looking at him, as her fingers still wandered playfully, "you don't believe me? Massage is proven very powerful for healing." Her hands massaged his neck, and then back up into his hair.

But, Tal's full attention was on his helmet now.

"Hmmmmm?" he said, peering carefully inside his helmet.

"Are you even listening to me?" Tess murmured, as she continued to gently rub his ears, and tickle his hair.

Tal wasn't. He inspected the visor. Remarkably, the visor was still intact. Well, the helmet had done its' job, and prevented his head from being split in two. He was definitely going to need a new helmet when he got back to his unit. Why did that thought give him such a sinking feeling in his stomach? Or, was that just what Tess was doing with his hair? But, with the visor still intact, were some of the electronics inside still working? Tal continued to inspect his helmet, looking at it from every angle. (sigh) He did like it when Tess rubbed his neck like that... With all the recent rain, Tal wondered how much moisture had gotten inside of it. The helmets were supposed to be somewhat moisture resistant, however they were meant to be sealed up with the rest of the suit. So, theoretically, water was never supposed to actually get _inside_ the helmet. But, with spit, blood, sweat, sneezes, and every other kind of bodily emission, (barf), (AT-TE rollovers), the electronics did sometimes get thoroughly doused. So, even though it had been raining-

"Tal... Tal?"

It took Tal a moment to realize Tess was calling him. He finally looked up at her.

She nodded her head toward the helmet, but didn't take her hands off from massaging his head, "I'm sorry I didn't bring it sooner, Tal. I should have realized how important it would be to you."

"Huh? No... this is great," Tal murmured, still distracted, "I was somewhat, uh," he paused, as he carefully studied a circuit in the light, "uh, unconscious, uh, anyway for a while there."

Tess removed her hands from his head. Tal looked up, disappointed. He rather missed her stroking his scalp. It _did_ feel nice. Tess pointed inside the helmet.

"I never realized how much circuitry and such you troopers carried around with you," Tess said, "I always assumed your helmets were helmets to protect your heads."

Tal smiled wryly, and brought his hand up to the lump he still had at the back of his head, "They are."

Tess looked inside at all of the complex circuitry inside the helmet, almost afraid of it, "What's the rest of it for, then?"

"Well, I could show you," Tal offered, "once I repair it. You could even try it on." Tal smiled at the image. He stared at his helmet, and then grimaced, "Or, at least try to repair it." He looked at the huge crack down the back, "this may never work again." He sighed, "But, I need to get back in touch with my unit."

Tess looked strangely crestfallen, but she quickly squashed the look. She smiled politely, "Yes, right, of course, you do. They must be terribly worried about you."

Tal looked a bit lost for a moment. He looked down, shook his head, "Yeah...I don't know. Maybe. I'm M.I.A right now, of course. But, if I don't report back..." his voice dropped off to a mumble, and he looked away, outside at the rain, lost in thoughts of Cooper and the dark ARCs.

Tess looked at him, concerned, her eyes wide, "What happens, Tal? What happens to you, if you don't report back?"

Tal just shook his head, but Tess could tell he was keeping something from her, "Um...I...uh..." Tal looked at her, trying to find the words to explain about what happened to the clones who deserted, but he couldn't find them. He hung his head down, and said quietly, "I have to go back, Tess."

Tess looked away, and wouldn't meet his eyes, "Yes, yes, of course, Tal. Of course, you do."

Tal felt like apologizing. He didn't know for what. An awkward silence ensued. Tal decided he would just apologize anyway. Tess had been so kind to him. He looked up at Tess. She looked very upset. "I'm sorry, Tess."

Tess just nodded her head several times, and then look away quickly, "Um, no, Tal, uh... I... if if I had some way of letting, uh, _them_, uh, know you were here, I would have done so."

Tal couldn't even really think who _them _was anymore. Without Cooper's quiet wisdom, the war just didn't make sense anymore. Actually, it had stopped making sense before then. But, being so close to his brother had made it bearable all that time.

Tess' fingers seemed to find his hair again on their own accord. Tal closed his eyes and relaxed into her touch. He sighed, reveling for the moment in the simple human contact. He delayed opening his eyes for a long moment. When he did open his eyes, he looked up and noticed Tess' eyes were closed. Had she fallen asleep? He studied her expression. No, that wasn't it. She was relishing the moment, just as he was- the simple human contact. _She was so pure_, Tal thought, _so pure and so good._

She opened her eyes after a moment, and looked down and smiled at him. Tal couldn't help but return the smile.

"I wish there was some way I could pay you back for everything you've done for me," Tal said.

Tess shook her head, "There's no need," her fingers intertwined seemed to find his hair on their own accord, "It's been so great having someone here in the house again. Well, other than that droid," she rolled her eyes, and gestured toward One One, "It's very lonely here at the farm," she smiled, but it was a sad smile, and she just looked down. An awkward silence ensued and Tal wasn't sure what to say. He couldn't say that she wasn't going to be lonely when he left. He couldn't say that he was coming back. He couldn't say that he wasn't going to leave. So, what was there to say? She looked so sad, and so beautiful. And, he knew he had no right to touch her, since he wasn't going to stay. Her fingers continued to wander around his scalp, and it was maddening because her touch awakened something in him. There was an aching, a hunger. She was so beautiful. He wanted to touch her back. He wanted to reach out and start exploring her skin. He had to keep telling himself that she was not his to touch.

The silence between them stretched on.

Tess sniffed, suspiciously.

"Are you OK, Tess?" Tal asked, wishing he was better at coming up with words at times like these.

Tess was looking down and away from him. Tess continued to look away, "I need to get you tools, right? So you can repair your helmet? What kind of tools do you need?" She still wouldn't make eye contact with him.

"Tess," Tal said tentatively.

Tess looked up at him hopefully, tears brimming in her eyes.

Tal took a deep breath, wanting nothing more than to pull her into his arms. If he did, he knew he'd never be able to let her go. "Tess, I wish things were different," he finally said, in one gust of air, and looked away.

"Yeah, you and me, both," Tess mumbled, getting up and stumbling away.

She returned, and without looking at him, handed him a well-worn tool built. It was overflowing with an odd assortment of tools, some of which looked handmade and strung-together out of spare parts.

"Thank you. Tess, could I also get my utility belt? I was wearing it when you found me. It has a small specialized tool kit on it, and also my-"

"-blaster. Yeah, you'll be wanting all your stuff. I'll get it," Tess said, her voice strangely husky.

Tess walked away without looking back. Tal sighed, feeling like he'd blown everything. And, the thing was he wasn't even quite sure what he'd done wrong. Somewhere in the back of his mind he could hear Cooper lecturing him, telling him he just still didn't get 'it.' Tal really wished he knew what 'it' was. Tal looked down at his broken helmet, the one he was trying to fix. Then, he looked around the farmhouse room. It struck him as ironic that he was trying to 'fix' something so that he could get back to a broken existence.

#


	5. Chapter 5 The Future

_Revised: November 12, 2014._

**"Left Behind"**

**Chapter 5**

# # #

"Tal, dinner is ready. Do you feel up to coming to the dinner table?" Tess called. "Are you testing your helmet?"

"Uh, yeah, I'll come. Uh, no, uh..." Tal reached up with his good hand to dislodge the helmet. He brought up his injured hand for leverage, trying to work around the cast that covered almost his entire hand. He felt the weight of the helmet lifting off his head.

"Did it work?" Tess asked politely, holding the helmet in her hands.

"No," Tal shook his head, accepting the helmet from her. He put the helmet down on the bed. Tal couldn't quite read her expression, but she almost looked relieved.

"Come on, dinner," she said, brightly, helping him up. Tal probably could have made it on his own, but he didn't mind slipping his arm around Tess' waist. He was starting to understand Cooper.

_Gah. Cooper. I wish I could talk to you now. Tell you that you were right. About everything._

"I'd like to propose a toast," Tess said, raising up her glass.

Tal raised up his eyebrows. He'd never done a 'toast,' but he was familiar with the custom. He raised up his glass.

"Here's to your recovery. Ten days ago, I found you on a battlefield. I'll admit I had my doubts about whether you were going to make it."

"That makes two of us," Tal agreed.

"And now, here you are, sitting at my dinner table. To you, Tal."

"The miracle was you. Pulling me off that battlefield. Thank you."

He held up his glass, and Tess clinked against it, smiling warmly at him. Tal felt a corresponding warmth spreading in his belly. He saw in his mind a flash of the dark ARCs who shot the brothers who dared leave the GAR, the vision he always had when the stories were whispered back and forth amongst the brothers. But, as he looked around the farmhouse room, he saw something else, too. He saw what Cooper had been talking about... other possibilities. Daring to hope for something more than dying for the Republic.

Tess picked up a small loaf of bread, ripping it in half with her hands and sharing it with him. Her hand brushed against his and the tingle went through his entire body. Fek. He wanted to touch her. More than anything. But, he couldn't help but feel he was was waging a war against the 'duty' that had been instilled in him since birth at Kamino.

Tess was talking. Tal tried to focus on what she was saying, but his mind was filled with conflicting thoughts. His brothers were still out there. Fighting. Cooper, Captain Rivers and the rest of Colo Squad were gone. Left behind on Agamar. But, there were still good brothers left in the 91st Recon. Sky was proof of the goodness in his brothers. He couldn't abandon them.

He ate in silence, focused on the food, his mind in turmoil. Tess helped Tal back to bed, putting her arm around his waist. She smelled off all the foods she'd been cooking, plus a scent that seemed to be uniquely Tess. It was very hard to let her go.

"Well, good night," she said, "thanks for having dinner with me." He could hear the loneliness in her voice, but something else, an affection. It wasn't just that he was better company than the defective medical droid and the eopies. She seemed to genuinely like being with _him_. He'd never imagined a woman could care for him. Turning away from her and retreating alone to his bed was almost as bad as leaving Coop behind on Agamar. Almost.

That night, Tal dreamed of the dark ARCs. There was entire squad of them, led by a lieutenant. He stepped outside the farmhouse, and saw an eWeb cannon in the Kaliberry orchard. The dark ARCs were systematically mowing down everything in the orchard. The cannon was splintering all of the trees, blasting the purplish fruit everywhere. Tal suddenly heard a horrible screaming. The ARCs had turned the eWeb on the herd, systematically slaughtering the eopies with perfect clone efficiency. The type of perfection the Kaminoans demanded of them at all times. The highly trained soldiers trained their weapons on the farmhouse.

"No," Tal murmured. He saw Kali step outside of the farmhouse. She was staring in horror at her orchard, and her eopies. Then, she opened her mouth. She was talking to the ARCs. What was she saying?

"Is this because he didn't go back?" she asked the dark ARCs.

The lieutenant nodded and then gave a crisp hand signal.

Tess bowed her head and spread her arms wide, eyes closed. Within seconds, both the woman and the farmhouse were shattered into pieces. The squad turned as one and marched away.

# # #


	6. Chapter 6 Never free

_Revised: November 12, 2014._

**Left Behind**

**Chapter 6**

_What I've felt _

_What I've known _

_Never free _

_Never me _

_- Metallica, Unforgiven._

Tal awoke with a splitting headache, and squinted out the window. It was already daylight and a light misty rain was falling. Tess was was gone. Working. Tal felt a stab of guilt. He wasn't used to lying in bed for such prolonged periods. He should be working. He rubbed at the back of his head, feeling the lump where he'd struck his head against the ground. Cooper bored him incessantly with his medical talk. Head injuries. He'd always said they were difficult to treat, and unpredictable in healing.

Tal shifted into a more comfortable position. He didn't even remember falling back asleep. His mind flashed through battle after battle; reliving portions of engagements in the Outer Rim over the past three years. The dream was particularly slow and painful as he relived every moment of leaving Cooper behind on Agamar, and the subsequent fight Tal had afterwards with Commander Neyo about going back to look for Coop, Rivers and the rest of Colo Squad. The argument that ended with Tal getting charged with insubordination and busted back from lieutenant to sergeant. The moment in which Tal decided he didn't fekkin' care anymore. About the war. About any of it. Fek all of them.

He was so _angry_.

The dream dragged him deeper and deeper. He was back on Kali and Sky was extending a hand toward him. Tal was aware enough to wish he could control the dream, and not take the hand. How different would events have been? If he just would have let himself be left behind on the battlefield? He would've been quickly outnumbered and shot to pieces by tinnies. Like Cooper. And, the rest of Colo Squad. Tal tried not to see an image of droids standing over Cooper's body, firing and firing and firing, but his dream-controlled mind created the image anyway. They kept firing until there was just a burnt, smoking, unrecognizable heap. Tal recoiled in horror, trying to back away.

Suddenly, he was up in the sky again, tightly gripping Sky's hand. The first shot had just hit the ship, and Tal knew he had just seconds before the second shot hit. What if he pulled free of Sky's hand, and jumped before the second shot hit? Could he save Sky? Tal tried to yank his hand free. But, Sky wouldn't let go. He gripped his hand harder, in an iron grip.

_'Incoming!'_

The shot was coming. Why couldn't he get free? He was trapped. Forever trapped. The shot hit, and suddenly he was falling- not only with Sky, but with the blast-riddled corpses of Cooper, Captain Rivers and the rest of Colo Squad falling beside him. It was his fault. All of it. His fault. He'd killed them. All of them.

Tal woke up screaming.

There was a droid standing over him.

Droid!

Reflexes took over and Tal's hand automatically reached for his blaster. His hand whipped up and aimed directly at the droid's head. Tal felt hot sharpnel pieces pepper him in the face, arm and head. The droid fell down smoking next to him.

The stinging pain from hot shrapnel cuts brought Tal back to reality.

Tal coughed - his half-healed lungs struggling with the smoky air. He blinked and rubbed at his eyes, looking around the room.

Tal peered down at the smoking remains of the droid. He stared down at the smoking corpse of the droid.

He'd just taken out One One, the annoying medical droid.

"Fierfek!" Tal muttered. There wasn't much left of it. He did a quick scan of the room. Shrapnel pieces had taken out one of the lamps, and embedded themselves in the floor. The room was a mess. He looked outside, noticing it was nearly full dark. The rain continued to pour down.

A bright light flashed outside. Followed by a thudding boom. Whoa. Canon fire?

He drew his blaster again, adrenaline pumping, until he identified the noise. Local weather phenomena. Thunder. Lightning.

He blew out a long sigh, trying to ease down from the adrenaline high. Tal grabbed his helmet, noticing his good hand left a bloody mark on it. He stared down in annoyance. Shrapnel. Blowing up tinnies at close range without armor was a _bad_ idea. Frags got everywhere.

He stared down at the small shards embedded in his skin with annoyance. It would be difficult to tug them out on his own. His lips twitched slightly in memory, remembering all the times Cooper had dug shrapnel out of him. Then, his gut sank. Cooper was dead. Had he ever told Cooper thank you for saving him time and again? Two words and he'd never said them. He was such an idiot.

Tal looked at his darkened helmet, seeing a shadow of his reflection in the cracked visor. He was broken clone.

He stared into the innards of the helmet, trying to think of a new angle to fixing it. He was coming up blank. Scratch could fix this thing, though. Best tech clone Tal had ever met. Except Scratch was dead, too. He'd been trying to hack into some Seppy systems on Chandrila when the self-destruct triggered. Tal and Cooper had been blown clear. They never found any trace of Scratch. Not even his ID tag.

_Like he never existed._

Is that how it's going to be for me? No trace left of me? What brother is going to remember me with all of Colo Squad gone? Tal tossed the helmet away in frustration. Another bolt of lightning struck at that moment, punctuating his outburst. Tal pushed himself up with a groan. He tried to reach down to clean up some of the pieces of OneOne. His ribs groaned with protest. He managed to gather up a few of the larger pieces before the pain caused his breathing to come in gasps. He straightened back up again, clutching his ribs. It was getting very dark. Tal spotted a lamp about ten steps away next to a couch.

_I can make it there. _He spotted something else of interest; a holonet receiver. He hadn't had any news from the outside since he'd arrived here. Tal worked his way over to the couch, sinking down with relief onto the cushions and powered on the receiver. Tal studied the unit. It was an older unit, different than the ones they'd used in the barracks. But, the basic operation was the same.

The old unit seemed pre-programmed for few options. He watched a local holonews broadcast, hoping for some news of the war. He sat impatiently through a discussion of lengthy discussion of local school Bolo-ball teams. Tal normally enjoyed watching Bolo-ball, but, hello? Wasn't there a war going on? And, then, finally, there it was - an off-hand mention of the effect on the local economy of both the Separatists and the Republic leaving the planet. A red-faced local farmer was talking about what an 'inconvenience' the war had been. Other merchants were interviewed who echoed similar sentiments. Tal's jaw dropped. A major inconvenience? This wasn't the location of a Bolo-ball tournament! Although, the way the farmer was discussing it, it seemed as if that's all it was. The strategic significance of the war didn't seem to matter - to anybody. Not to the news reporters. Not to the farmers. So, why did Sky have to die? Why did Cooper die? Why was Scratch obliterated as if he never existed? Why were two million of his brothers created, and then blown apart again? What was all of this for anyway? The view on the screen changed, and Tal gasped. "The abandoned barracks are being converted into a Sabaac Hall."

Tal stared at the empty barracks, looking like a ghost town. His gut twisted. The holocam moved through the barracks, showing row after row of empty metal beds. He saw the row where _**he**_ had slept. There was no standard grey Republic bedding, no pin-ups of Twi'leks, no footlockers with perfectly cleaned armor. Not a trace or scrap of the brothers who had occupied the space.

Tal wondered who cleaned out his bunk and the footlocker with his fatigues and few 'personal' items. He had a datapad, mainly used for training and reading ref manuals, but he did have a few holopics of Colo Squad. After Agamar, as one of the few surviving members of Colo, Tal had been assigned to clean out the bunks of Cooper, Rivers, Jinx and the others. He'd kept their small remembrances, all of them. Tal stopped making friends after the rest of the squad was lost. He was somewhat close to Zig and Julu, but they'd both been last early on in the Battle of Kali. He'd added their things to his collection. So, who had all of those things now? So were all of remembrances tossed in the flash-disposal when they'd shipped out?

All evidence that any of them had existence simply gone?

He froze the image on the screen, staring at the empty barracks.

He'd been fekkin' abandoned by the Republic.

Dropped out of an gunship.

Left behind.

And, abandoned.

Tal leaned back against the couch, thinking of the war, of Sky, of Cooper, of Scratch... He could feel something running down his face, and he knew this time it wasn't blood.

Clones weren't supposed to cry. But, apparently he wasn't much of a clone. Not one the Republic carried about anyway.

# # #

Tess tiptoed quietly back into the farmhouse, frozen-through and exhausted.

Tal was probably asleep already, and she didn't want to wake him up. She felt badly that she'd been gone so long. He must be starving.

Tess's nose wrinkled.

_What is that smell? _

She gasped in surprise when she saw the smoking remains of One One. The medical droid's head was completely blown apart. For all the times the droid had annoyed her, she had never considered taking a blaster to it.

She peered down at the couch where Tal had been sleeping for the past week. She gasped again. In the dim light, amidst all the blankets and pillows, no Tal! But, there was blood on the sheets. Tess swirled around, looking around the room in a panic.

Her eyes immediately settled back on the lone light in corner of the room. With her heart pounding, she leapt over One One's smoldering head, and ran over to the couch. All thoughts of the droid were forgotten.

As she rounded the couch, the sight that greeted her tugged on her heart strings. Tal was asleep, his face bloodied, tears streaking down his cheeks. Streaks of blood trickled down one arm. She took a deep breath, immensely relieved he was still in one piece, more or less. She quickly went and retrieved the first aid kit, a small bowl of water, and a warm cloth.

Tal woke up immediately anyway, his hand going for the blaster at his belt. Before his eyes had even opened, he had drawn the blaster.

"Tal!" Tess shouted.

Tal's eyes blinked open, and he focused on Tess.

"It's you," he said, his voice expressing his relief as his eyes scanned her face, "you're back."

He tucked the blaster back into his belt. Then, his eyes widened suddenly as if he just then remembered something he needed to tell Tess. He sat up quickly.

"I shot your droid," he blurted out.

"Yes, I noticed that," Tess said calmly. "Hold still." She leaned toward Tal. She opened up the first aid kit and began cleaning the shrapnel cuts on his face and head, "I take it you two had a disagreement?"

Tal shook his head.

"No, the droid didn't do anything."

Tess waited patiently for Tal to elaborate. She noticed he never referred to One One by name.

Tal winced as Tess found a piece of shrapnel still stuck in his skin. She took the tweezers out of the kit, and carefully removed it. She cleaned the area and applied bacta to it. She began carefully running her fingers through Tal's hair, looking for other fragments. Tal closed his eyes, relaxing under the familiar sensation of Tess's fingers on his scalp.

"Go on," Tess prompted, not finding any more fragments. Sensing Tal relaxing, she continued to carefully massage his scalp.

Tal sighed, "I was dreaming- of fighting droids... all different battles sort of jumbled together..."

Tal shook his head, finding it difficult to say anything more about the dreams. Tess continued her gentle soothing.

"I woke up and that tinnie was standing over me," Tal gestured at the smoking remains of One One, and his voice was a mixture of confusion and regret.

"And, you took out the droid," Tess said, understanding hitting her, although it didn't take the shock out of visualizing the violent scene.

"I'm sorry," hanging his head down, "I've made a mess of things."

Tess slipped her hand around to the back of his head. She gingerly felt the spot where Tal had cracked his head against Sky's helmet. Tal winced as she touched the spot.

"You have a head injury and been through major trauma."

He shook his head. "Doesn't excuse what I did."

"That droid always drove me crazy anyway."

"Me, too, but I shouldn't have shot it," Tal said, still shaking his head with regret.

She began cleaning his face with the washcloth. "If it's any consolation, I don't own any other droids." She held out her hand. Tal offered up his arm. "I take it this is some more fall-out from the droid formerly known as One-One?"

Tal nodded solemnly, "Yes, he seems to have given almost as good as he got."

Tess actually laughed at that. She took the tweezers and began pulling more small metal fragments from Tal's arm. Tal winced, but didn't pull his arm away.

Tess inspected his arm carefully, "OK, I think I got all of them. Do you want a painkiller?"

Tal shook his head, "No, this is the least of what I've been through this week. I'm fine."

"Do all clones abuse their bodies this much?" she asked idly, just making conversation.

Tal looked at her oddly, cocking his head to one side, "Not usually by choice." Tess's face wrinkled, her head went back and she let out a most unlady-like sneeze.

Tal grabbed Tess's hands and felt it. Tal looked down at her hand, frowning.

"Your hand is very cold," he commented. He reached up with his other hand and felt her cheek. "You're chilled, Tess!"

Tess nodded, "It was cold, today. Temperature is dropping quickly outside."

In response, Tal swept one of his masculine arms around her shoulders and pulled her close to him.

Tess looked up at him in surprise.

"This is standard field procedure when the temperature drops, or someone is in danger of getting hypothermic," Tal said simply.

"Oh," Tess responded, moving around, not used to the feeling of being held in someone's arms.

Tal had practiced this field procedure before, but somehow it felt entirely different with Tess. He'd done the gesture automatically. Since Tal noticed Tess was relaxing in his arms, he relaxed as well, settling back against the couch. She yawned hugely, and began to close her eyes. Was she preparing to go to sleep? Should Tal suggest she move to her quarters? Somehow, Tal was reluctant to make the suggestion. Instead, he simply just watched her eyes drift shut, and then watch her head settle down into his shoulder. He never knew it could be so pleasurable just to watch someone sleep. He was sorry he'd destroyed her droid, but not sorry that this had been the outcome. Tal yawned, and settled his head back against the couch. Within minutes, he was asleep.

# # #

Tess awoke to hear a quiet, distressed cry of pain. She recognized the sound.

She looked over at Tal. What demons haunted him so in his sleep? From her intimate position on his shoulder, she studied his sleeping face with concern. She heard him whisper different names.

"Cooper... Is that you?... Cooper. Come back, Coop! I'm sorry, Coop! I'm so sorry! Forgive me, brother! Scratch! Get out of there! It's a trap!... Sky... no... let go...let me die..."

She couldn't stand to hear him so tortured. She touched her hands to his awoke with a start, grabbing for his blaster. He put the blaster right up against her temple.

"Tal! Stop! It's me, Tess!" Tess shouted, staring with wide eyes at the blaster. For a moment, Tess wondered if his head injury had robbed him of his short-term memory again. Tal's eyes darted around wildly for a moment, before settling on Tess. He immediately released the blaster, letting it drop. He closed his eyes, and said nothing for a long moment. She wished she knew more about head injuries. But, then Tal's eyes snapped back open and focus on her.

"Tess," he whispered hoarsely, with recognition.

He sat up, and tried to push her away from him.

"Don't push me away, Tal," Tess pleaded, "tell me about the dream."

Tess began gently stroking his face, and then his scalp. Tal stared at her with a tortured look.

"I keep seeing my brothers," Tal said, "the ones who died... the ones who meant the most to me."

Tal stopped, running a hand through his closely cropped hair.

"We left Cooper behind on Agamar. The area was swarming with droids. He was still there, tending to vode who were down. The rest of the squad was still there. The Captain. The gunners. We sent four gunships to try to get them out." His voice changed to a tortured whisper. "None of them made it out." The pain and bitterness were evident in Tal's voice. For a moment, he was completely lost in another time and place. "The whole valley was crawling with droids. All closing in on their position. They were completely surrounded... Commander Neyo ordered us to _leave. _Said we were pulling out immediately. The planet was lost. But, we _left_ them there. They were my closest vode for three years and _we- left- them - there_. I told Cooper we were coming for him. I promised him we wouldn't leave without him. But, the commander he-" Tal shook his head. "I ended up getting into a fight." He shook his head. "I had to be subdued, and then I was punished for disobeying a direct order."

Tess settled comfortably up against Tal's shoulder. "Are you sure this isn't bothering your injuries? I could sit somewhere else."

"No," Tal answered immediately, "I feel fine."

Tess looked up at him, and said quietly, "Except for the nightmares."

Tal met her gaze, and she saw the vulnerability in his eyes.

"Yes," his voice trailed off and took on a haunted quality. "Tess, I can't stay here."

"Why go back?" she gave him a frustrated look. "After everything you've told me?"

"Because if I stay they'll kill you," Tal said simply. She stared at him. "Deserters, Tess. They shoot them. And, they'll likely shoot anyone around them. Clones can't leave the army voluntarily because we never joined. We were cloned into this existence."

"But, that makes you slaves!" she objected.

"Yes," he admitted, unable to deny the reality of his existence.

"Surely, you have some rights!"

Tal shook his head. "I'm not a citizen, Tess. I don't have _any_. I can only go where I'm ordered and shoot what I'm told to shoot. That's it."

"But, that's-"

"Tess," Tal shook his head, "don't argue with me, OK? It won't change anything. About me. About who I am. Tomorrow, drive me back to the battlefield. Leave me where you found me. I'll find some scavenged equipment from there and contact the GAR. Get a pickup."

"What if-"

Tal knew there was an equal chance the Seppies would pick up any transmission he made off-planet. His plan was probable suicide. But, Tess would be safe.

# # #


	7. Chapter 7 Letting go

**"Left Behind"**

**Chapter 7**

The next morning gleamed sunny and bright. The drenching rains of the day before had washed everything clean.

Tess had not argued with Tal on his decision. They had not talked any further after Tess had agreed to take him back. She'd silently helped him back to bed, and then quietly slipped off to bed herself. She was exhausted, and fell into a dreamless sleep without ever changing out of her still somewhat damp clothing.

Morning had a way of giving things a fresh start, though. She felt better after showering and putting on clean clothes. Tal was already awake, and sitting on the edge of his bed. Their eyes met, and they looked at each other a bit awkwardly for a long moment. It felt as if they'd shared a great intimacy the night before, and now it was the morning after. Tess took a deep breath, closed her eyes for a moment, composing herself, then walked over to Tal.

"You've been wanting to shower," Tess said to break the silence, "do you want to shower..." She tried to tack on the words 'before you go,' but had difficulties getting them out.

But, Tal nodded. "Yes, please, a shower would be great." Then, he smiled in his charming way, "For both of us." He blushed furiously, then, realizing the double-entendre of what he'd said. He shook his head, "No, I meant no offense, I mean I haven't showered-"

Tess laughed, and touched Tal's arm lightly, "I know what you meant. Come on, I'll help you to the shower." She helped him up, and walked him into her bedroom. She could see his curiosity, as he looked around her bedroom. He tried to be subtle about it, but he was glancing at everything they passed. Tess found it all very amusing. Tal was curious about everything. She walked Tal all the way over to the shower. "Hang on, I'm going to get you a towel, and a razor so you can shave."

Tal ran a hand over the facial hair that had grown in over the past ten days. "Too much?"

Tess laughed, "I'm not even sure I remember what you look like under all that."

Tal blushed, suddenly eager to shave and see her reaction. He felt a pang when he remembered he was leaving for good after he finished his shower. '_It's all for the best,' _he reminded himself, _'It's what's best for Tess.'_

"There's shampoo and soap already in there. Sorry if it's not the most manly stuff. It's all I have," Tess said, still standing there in front of him.

Tal was waiting for her to leave so he could get undressed.

"Do you want any help getting your clothes off?" Tess asked, feeling reluctant, for some reason, to leave the bathroom.

Tal had to stop himself from groaning out loud at her question. "Uh...no," Tal answered, in a strangled voice, "I'll manage... Thanks, though."

"You sure?" Tess asked.

Tal didn't trust himself to speak, so he just nodded, afraid to even meet Tess' eyes. He was starting to get a visual of himself and Tess in the shower. He grabbed the towel from Tess and placed it in front of his growing erection. "No! Really, I'm fine. Thanks! I'm going to shower now." Tal said, taking a step like he was going to get in the shower. He hoped Tess would take the hint and get going. Didn't the woman realize how hot she was? This was torture!

"Oh, yes, right! Sorry, I'll get out of here so you can have your privacy. I'm going. Just yell if you need me to come in and help you, OK?"

Tal nodded, and watched Tess leave. He breathed a huge sigh of relief when she closed the door. He undressed with trembling fingers and willed his erection to go down. When it wouldn't, he figured he'd just have to take care of it in the shower. Hopefully Tess would respect his privacy and not come in during the middle of his shower to 'check' on him. Well, if she did, she'd get an eyeful, that's for sure. He couldn't help it, though. Tal soaped up his hair, and then used the soap on his hands to lubricate his stiff erect member. Giving the door one last peek to make sure it was shut, he closed his eyes. He fantasized about having Tess in the shower with him. It was hard not to groan out loud at the fantasy. It took no time at all until he felt hot semen running out over his hands. He felt a little better, some of the sexual tension that had been building up relieved. He then finished washing up and shaved using a mirror in the shower. He was surprised by his reflection. He hadn't realized he'd grown that much facial hair. But, almost two weeks without shaving would bring about some changes. He carefully trimmed off all the hair, and felt much more himself when it was all gone. Finally done, Tal shut the water off. It was the longest shower he'd ever taken. He hoped it was OK that he was in the shower that long. He assumed civilians were a bit less strict on showering time than in the military. He dried off and then wrapped the towel around his waist.

Tess looked up when Tal appeared at her bedroom door.

"That was quick," she said.

Tal found this amusing. Civilian showering time must be even longer than he thought.

Tess' mouth went dry. Tal was still slightly glistening from his shower. Wearing nothing but that towel, she could see his muscular physique in all its' glory. Even with much of his bandages still on, he was absolutely magnificent.

"Is something wrong?" Tal asked.

"Uh, no," Tess said, slightly embarrassed, recovering quickly. How could she tell him she was ogling him? "Uh...I'm... uh, just not used to seeing you without the beard."

Tal reached up to his face and felt his chin. He smiled, "Yes, it felt good to shave. Thank you again for letting me use your shower."

For a moment, he got an odd look on his face that Tess couldn't place.

"Uh, anytime," Tess said quickly, but then realized there wouldn't be another time. Tess quickly picked up the pile she had laid out. "I have your clothes here. I cleaned and repaired them." She placed the pile on his bed, and then helped him over to the bed. He wouldn't be sleeping there anymore, but it had been his spot for so long it just seemed an appropriate place for him to get dressed. "OK, I assume you want to put this back on," she said, sitting down next to him on the bed, and showing him his bodysuit. "Most of it is still intact, except for the back, which is completely destroyed. So, I have a substitute for you. It's a work shirt. It is not as thick as the other material, but it's not too bad. It's also black. It belonged to my father. It had some holes, but I repaired them all while you were in the shower, so it is ready for you to wear now. Is it OK?"

Tal nodded gratefully, appreciating Tess's thoughtfulness, and attention to detail.

She helped him up off the bed. It was difficult for him to get to a standing position on his own, since his abdominal muscles/ribs weren't fully healed. But, once he was up, he was fine.

"OK, here are your boxers," Tess said, blushing a bit, as she handed him his underwear. She wished she had thought to give him those before he headed into the bathroom. Tal blushed as he accepted them. "Your socks. And, you have the rest of your armor. Did I miss anything?"

Tal shook his head.

"Can I help you get dressed?" Tess asked.

Tal remembered what had happened to him in the bathroom, "No. Thank you. I'll manage. But, thank you, Tess. You've been a huge help. If I get stuck, I'll ask for help."

"I'm going into the kitchen to make breakfast. I'll make sure to give you your, uh, privacy." Since Tal had mentioned it in the bathroom, Tess figured it was important to him.

"Thank you, Tess," Tal said, then he grabbed her arm as she was walking away, "although, it's probably a moot point since you saw me in all my glory for a good seven days or so when I first came here." He shrugged, smiled and blushed.

Tess laughed, ruffled his hair, and said: "I'm going to make a huge stack of Kaliberry pancakes. You better be hungry, Tal." She tried to memorize the image of Tal blushing as he smiled, so she could never forget how he looked in that moment.

She was just starting to make an impressive tower of pancakes, when she heard Tal admit: "OK, I could use some help."

He'd gotten his boxers on, thankfully. But was having difficulties getting the different pieces of his bodysuit on, since he didn't have the mobility to bend or twist at the waist.

"Come over here," Tess said brightly, hoping she sounded casual, patting one of the kitchen bar stools. Tal started heading over, carrying his bodysuit. Tess flipped over her latest pancake, then went over to assist him.

She walked him over, liking the way it felt to have her arm around him when he was wearing so little. He had no extra body fat anywhere on his frame. He'd lost weight over the past ten days. But, it just defined his muscles even more. Tess was struck by his pure masculine presence.

"Hang on a sec," Tess said, heading back to the stove, to rescue a pancake before it burnt. She flipped it onto the growing stack on the plate. She saw Tal sniff the air appreciatively. She poured batter for another pancake into the pan. She pulled a pancake off the top of the stack. "OK, I'll let you try one early." She held it up to him, and offered him a bite. Tal smiled and took a huge bite. He closed his eyes, and she could tell he was just relishing the sweet taste of the pancake. His face just lit up with pleasure. He smiled and opened up his mouth again. She shoved the rest of the pancake in his mouth. "OK, that's it until breakfast time." Tal chewed the rest of the pancake, and smiled again. He eyed the huge stack of pancakes appreciatively, and also eyed how much batter was still left in the bowl. She could tell he was calculating how many pancakes she could make total, and how big that stack was going to get. She was very pleased he liked her cooking so much. She flipped her pancake over, and then turned her attention back to the bodysuit.

"OK, let's get you dressed," she said, quite pleased she got to help dress him after all. They got the suit on quickly, much too quickly for Tess' liking. She buttoned him into the black work shirt from her father, enjoying getting to run her fingers over his muscular chest. She felt Tal shiver.

"Are you cold?" she asked.

Tal shook his head quickly. She put a hand up to check him for fever, but he seemed fine. Tal just looked away quickly, and wouldn't meet her eyes.

"OK, I assume you'll want your armor?" Tess asked.

Tal nodded.

"Is after breakfast OK? We should get started on these pancakes while they're still hot."

Tal's eyes lit up at the mention of the pancakes. Tess grabbed out two plates, and set up a casual breakfast dining for them at the breakfast bar. She put the towering stack of pancakes in front of him, while she continued to cook a few more.

"OK, Dig in. Take as many as you like," she said.

She went and retrieved sweet Kaliberry syrup and two sweetened cups of caf. Tal loaded up his plate with pancakes, but did not start eating.

"What's wrong?" Tess said.

Tal loaded the remainder of the pancakes onto Tess' plate.

"I couldn't eat without you," Tal said simply. He folded his hands in front of him, and waited patiently.

Tess smiled at his constant thoughtfulness. She turned off the stove, and slid into the chair next to him. Tal poured syrup over Tess' pancakes first, and then over his own.

"Thank you for making breakfast, Tess. They look wonderful."

Tess' heart wanted to break for the simple warmth and domesticity of the moment. How could Tal not see all the goodness there was inside of him?

Tal held up his cup of coffee, and saluted Tess, "Thank you again, Tess, for everything you've done for me. To you, Tess." He nodded respectively to her, took a sip, and then dug into his food.

"These are delicious," Tal said appreciatively, around huge mouthfuls of food. His first two pancakes were already gone. Tess watched him eat, while she ate her own breakfast. She was hungrier than she'd thought, and she realized it had been a long time since she'd eaten Kaliberry pancakes. It felt good to eat a meal with someone to share it with like this. She tried not to think ahead to later that day, and their inevitable separation. She handed the plate up to Tal.

"More?"

Tal nodded, his mouth too full to speak. He speared a couple of more with his fork, and added them to his plate. She handed Tal the syrup. She watched him take another bite, and close his eyes with pleasure as all the tastes hit his tongue.

"You sure enjoy your food, Tal," Tess said with a smile.

"It's a clone thing," Tal said, around bites, "we're always hungry."

Tess looked at him in surprise. Up until now, and the little bit he'd shared the night before, he hadn't freely volunteered much information about his life in the military.

"How come?" Tess prompted gently, curious to learn more. She picked up the caf pitcher and refilled Tal's cup.

"Because of our rapid aging," Tal said casually, grabbing the syrup and drizzling a little more around the edges of his pancakes.

Tal took a swig, of his caf and smiled.

"Ah, caf, I've missed it." He looked up at Tess, and noticed she was looking at him, puzzled. "What is it?" he asked, looking down at his plate, then himself, "did I do something wrong?"

Tess shook her head, quickly, feeling saddened that Tal was always so quick to judge himself and think he'd done wrong. "No, Tal. Not at all." She quickly speared more pancakes on his plate. Tal smiled. "What did you mean that clones were always hunger because of your rapid aging?"

"Oh, _that_," Tal said, "clones are aged rapidly so we can ready to fight faster. We're grown in vats and all that." Tal said, vaguely gesturing with his hands. He picked up the syrup, and drizzled it over his latest stack of pancakes. "Wow, we really made a dent in that stack, huh?"

Tess laughed, "Yes, Tal _we _did," thinking she'd finished maybe two herself, and the rest of the tower of Kaliberry pancakes had been eaten by Tal. She poured Tal more caf. "Tal?"

Tal looked up. Tess reached over, and wiped a bit of syrup off the side of his mouth with a clean napkin. He smiled, "Thanks."

Tess smiled back, "Tal, how old are you?"

"Old," Tal said with sigh, looking resigned, and sad. He took another sip of his coffee. "Never thought I'd outlive Cooper and Tech and the others..." He shook his head, looking very far away for a moment.

"Well, exactly how old are you?" Tess asked, a growing knot of dread growing in her stomach. Some of the odd inconsistencies in Tal's behavior were starting to make sense to her.

Tal shrugged, and sighed sadly again, sounding very resigned and world-weary. He wouldn't meet her eyes. "I'm 13."

Tess felt her stomach drop out, and she put a hand over her mouth. At that moment, a buzzer went off at the stove. Tess took off like a shot, and headed to the kitchen. She pulled something out of the oven, and then just stood there, facing away from Tal, her shoulders shaking.

Tal stared at her back, retracing their conversation in his head. "Tess, did I say something wrong?"

"No," Tess said, quickly. Her voice sounded choked and shaky, and she wouldn't turn around.

"Tess, whatever it is, I'm sorry." Tal pushed himself up with his good hand, stifling a gasp of pain from his ribs. Tess was instantly by his side.

"Tal, you should have waited for me," she lectured, her hands beside him, supporting him.

Tal turned, his hands reaching for her face. "You've been crying," he said, confused, feeling the wet spots on her cheeks. "Why?"

Tess shook her head. She wiped the spots with the back of her hand, and sniffed, "We should finished getting you dressed, right?"

"Tess?" Tal said. But, Tess was already steering him away, and back toward his bed. She wouldn't discuss it. He knew he had no right to push the issue, since he had chosen to leave. She helped him get his armor on, piece by piece. With each piece, she felt like she was further sealing Tal away from her. She finally handed him his helmet. He clipped it to his belt. She took a step back and looked at the transformation. She sighed heavily, and then quickly wiped at her eyes again.

"Tess?" Tal questioned again, worried. "Are you going to be OK?"

Tess just shook her head. Then quickly said, "I, uh, made you something to bring with you, so you wouldn't be hungry. Hang on, I'll go wrap them up."

Tal watched her go. She headed into the kitchen. Tal watched as she wrapped up the baked goods she'd pulled out of the oven earlier.

"Kaliberry muffins," she said, quietly, subdued. "My mom's recipe." She walked back over and handed him the neatly wrapped bundle. It was still warm.

"Thank you, Tess, for everything," Tal said. He wanted to kiss her, and to feel her warmth, just as he was feeling the warmth from the bundle of muffins she had just handed him. The muffins seemed so symbolic of the warmth she had extended to him over the past week and a half. They stood there looking at each, and the moment stretched on. But, Tal knew that in reality, nothing had changed. "You've given me something good that I can always think back on. That is a very precious gift."

Tess nodded, choking up again. "Let's go," she whispered, nodding her head, and helping Tal out to the speeder. Tal didn't look back as they pulled away from the farmhouse.

# # #


	8. Chapter 8 The Battlefield

**Left Behind**

**Chapter 8**

**Answers on the Battlefield**

Tal's thoughts were in turmoil as Tess drove him back to the battlefield. He couldn't even bring himself to take one last look back at the homestead. He clutched the warm package of muffins, and reminded himself he was doing this for all the right reasons. He resisted the urge to glance over at Tess' face. He still couldn't figure out why telling Tess his age had brought her to tears. He truly wasn't any good at these social things. He looked down at the muffins. Despite how inept he was, Tess had been kind to him anyway. He wondered how the rest of his unit would react when he returned. He expected they would be surprised. But, he didn't actually expect anyone to be happy. They would want to know what happened to Sky. They definitely wouldn't be happy when he told them about Sky. He'd still have to spend some time in the medcenter. He doubted anyone would visit him. He was already dreading the long, dreary hours in the medcenter. His fingers ran along a crease on the foil of the muffin package, thinking of the hours he'd spent watching Tess in the kitchen while he'd been recovering. He rested his broken hand on top of his broken helmet while the scenery sped by. Tal didn't remember the exact distance to the battlefield. He'd been so out of it when Tess had first rescued him.

"So, what exactly are you planning on doing when we get to the battlefield?" Tess' voice startled him.

She gazed over at Tal. He had been so silent for the entire trip so far, just staring out at the countryside going by.

Tal's gestured gestured clumsily to his broken helmet, using his casted hand.

"I'm hoping to find the parts I need to repair my bucket. Uh, my helmet." Tal said, "or just grab a whole other one. I'll signal my unit. Then, I just wait. They'll track me, and send someone to retrieve me...when they can."

Tal looked over at Tess. She was completely silent, and looked pale.

"What's wrong?" he asked with concern, putting a hand on her sleeve.

She shook her head, and didn't say anything. Tal wondered again what he had said wrong. He was feeling so lost about much of what he'd done. Tal sighed, and shook his head. Well, soon, he could stop messing things up so badly. Tal was so lost in thought, he was surprised when Tess pulled the speeder to a halt.

"We're here," Tess said, still sounding shaken and unsure. Tal took a quick peak at her face. She looked pale. Why? But, she was already getting up, and coming around to help him up. He was stiff from sitting, and groaned a little as she gently pulled him up. "You OK?" she asked, with concern.

Tal nodded, staring around at his surroundings. The scene had changed dramatically from the last time he'd been there. With the smoke of the battle gone, the area once again looked just like a country valley - just with a lot of droid parts. The rain had encouraged the first blooms of spring. The flowers and grasses sprouted up around partial and full droid torsos, and bits and parts of broken droid tanks. Tal pulled himself free of Tess and walked slowly and carefully on his own. He walked several paces in one direction, then slowly turned, and walked several paces in another. Tess was a few steps behind him, ready to intervene if necessary. But, she gave him his space. He looked down, around, his gaze scanning up and down the hillside. Tess continued to watch him, silently.

She watched him bend over to pick up something that looked like a flash of white. His face flashed with pain as he bent over, grabbing his ribs. Tess began walking toward him. He looked at the piece with disgust, and discarded it.

"Just a droid part," he said, still halfway stooped over.

Tess moved to his side, and helped him gently straighten up.

"I don't get it," he said, "where are all the clones? Where are my brothers?"

He looked at Tess. Her face was pale, and tears were streaming down her cheeks.

His brow furrowed in confusion, "What's wrong?"

"Come with me," Tess said, her voice hitching. She looped an arm around his waist, and gently led him up the hillside. They kept climbing until they reached a spot that looked out over the valley below. "Are you OK?" Tess asked, once they'd reached the top. It had been a long climb. Tal nodded. Despite the difficulty of the climb, he'd enjoyed the closeness to Tess. He didn't know why he was here, but he could appreciate the beauty of the spot. It was a breathtaking spot. They could see the entire valley below them. Far off in the distance he could even make out a farmhouse and a barn. Tal pointed to the property.

"Tess, is that your-"

Tess nodded.

"Tess, I don't get it. Why are we-" Tal started.

And, then he spotted them.

Row after row of neat mounds of earth. Freshly dug. He looked over at Tess, understanding finally sinking in. Her late nights, her exhaustion, the mud clinging to her boots. Tal broke free from Tess, and slowly walked over to the mounds of dirt. He slowly and carefully walked around each and every mound. He then turned back toward the battle field below, for a long moment, silent and unmoving.

Tess stayed where she was - giving him his space. Tal finally turned, and faced Tess. He looked at her, struggling for words. He looked up toward the sky, hoping maybe Cooper could give him some inspiration. _Cooper? What do I do here? Little help, buddy!_ He'd been messing everything up so badly lately. He wanted to get this right-

Tess broke the silence, her head bowed, "Tal, I'm so sorry. I didn't know you needed the helmets. Do you want me to -"

Tess looked up startled as she felt Tal's hands on her shoulders. She hadn't even heard him walk over. She felt his gloved, armored hand tilt her chin up so that her face looked into his. His intense brown eyes bored into hers.

Next thing she knew, his lips had descended upon hers. She was so startled she didn't respond at first. She just gasped. Tal pulled back at her gasp, looking into her eyes. She could see the question in his eyes. She took her hand and interlaced it between his gloved fingers. Tal looked down at their intertwined hands, and then back up at Tess. She leaned in toward him. He brushed the tears off her face with his fingertips. His lips came down upon hers again - slower this time. She leaned in to meet him halfway. He brought one arm down around her back and pulled her closer to him. She slid one arm around his neck, craving the closeness. She lost all track of time as their lips met and exchanged pent-up feelings. Finally, they broke apart, both breathing heavily. Tal gripped her hand possessively in his, and walked with her over to the grave mounds.

"Clones don't usually get much of a burial," Tal started out, speaking softly, "We just grab the ID tallies. Bodies are disposed of in the most efficient manner possible. Much of the time we have to just _leave our brothers behind_." Tess could hear the pain in his voice, as he said the last sentence.

Tal sank down to his knees, and puts his hands on one of the mounds. He cocked his head, and looked up at her, "You took the time to bury men you didn't even know." He said the words almost reverently.

"Why?" he asked at last.

Tess sank down to her knees next to him.

Tess felt tears beginning to flow again. She wished she could stop crying. "It's my fault," she whispered hoarsely, putting her hands on the mound next to his. The tears dripped off the bottom of her chin, and plinked down onto the soft mound below.

Tal looked at her, confused. "What's your fault? General Grevious? The war in the Outer Rim? The Jedi?"

Tess shook her head, "I could have saved more of your brothers if I had reacted faster... That day, when the droid squads came through, if only I hadn't stopped to search for weapons. If I'd known that some of these men were still alive, then maybe I could saved them before-"

Tal quickly dusted his hands off against his armor, and silenced her by placing a gentle finger against her lips.

"You didn't kill these men, Tess."

"But, I could have saved them! They were only 13!"

Tal thought this would be a bad time to point out he was actually one of the oldest clones on the battlefield. As the war progressed, shinies were being rushed out of training in Kamino at age five. There were rumors of Coruscant-manufactured clones that were battle-ready from vat to finish in just over twelve months. So, yeah, thirteen _was_ old. But, for some reason, Tess didn't seem to think so.

"These men died in combat, Tess. You didn't kill them."

"But, I was able to save you!"

Tal smiled sadly, brushing Tess' hair back from her face, "A lucky stroke of fate, I think, helped along by you." Tal pointed down to the mounds of earth all around them, and said gently, "This was my brothers' fate, Tess. This was their time to die."

Tess buried her face gently against Tal's chest for a moment, composing herself. Then, she took a deep breath, and looked up at him again. She put her hand on top of Tal's helmet, clipped to his belt. Trying to keep her voice calm and steady, she asked: "Do you still want those parts, so you contact... the others?"

Tal turned and faced the valley, looking out at the scene of the battlefield. He was quiet for a long moment. He looked back at the mounds of fresh earth, regarding them for a long time. He unclipped his broken helmet from belt and stared into it. It's broken visage stared back at him. He finally met Tess's eyes.

"I think the war is over for me."

# # #

Tal asked Tess where she'd buried the clone who was with him the day Tess found him.

"He was the first one I buried," Tess said, quietly. Tess pointed.

Tal nodded. "His name was Sky," Tal said, closing his eyes at the mention of the fallen clone.

"Do you want to-" Tess indicated the mound. Tal nodded. Tess took Tal by the hand. They walked slowly to the very first of the mounds. It was under a tree whose branches were just budding with their first spindly green blossoms of spring. Tal handed her his helmet. Tess nodded, and walked away for a moment. She returned with the shovel she'd been using to dig the graves. She dug out a spot next to Sky's grave, and reverently placed the helmet in the hole. Tal had a lump in his throat as he watched Tess push dirt back over his helmet, obscuring it completely from view.

That life was over.

# # #


	9. Chapter 9 Epilogue

**REVISED: JANUARY 23, 2012**

_I revised the ending a bit to polish a few things that had been bugging me for a while. Nothing major, just small stuff that had been getting under my collar and irking me. But, it reads much better now. Tal's fight scene is gruffer, and more Boba Fett-like. I wanted him to be more bad ass, since Tess had never seen him fight before. I wanted him to fly into the scene like an old time hero. I also wanted their love scene to be heavier on romance, and less about the mechanics of what they were doing. I've gotten better about writing love scenes since working on "Whatever Happened to Captain Rex?" and used that to improve the ending of this story. Enjoy._

**WARNING: THIS CHAPTER CONTAINS ADULT LANGUAGE AND/OR CONTENT.**

**LEFT BEHIND**

**EPILOGUE**

They were both silent as they drove back to the farmhouse. Tal was lost deep in thought. Tess was overwhelmed from the emotions of the day. When they arrived back at the farmhouse, something didn't seem right to Tal. He couldn't quite place what it was, but somehow his danger sense was activated. He wondered if it was just leftover emotions from a draining day. Maybe it was just being back at the battlefield? Seeing the graves of his fallen brothers? Tal shook his head, unsure why he was feeling so uneasy.

The injured clone was stiff again from sitting. Tess helped him up and into the house. He could still smell a hint of Kaliberry pancakes in the main room. Tal thought he would feel happy to be back, but something still didn't feel right.

"I'm going to check the eopies, and then I'll be inside to start dinner. Why don't you take a rest? Do you want me to help you with your armor?"

"Just leave it," he said, sinking down on the couch. After Tess left the room, he sank his head back and closed his eyes. But, after just a few seconds, his eyes popped back open again. Something just didn't _feel_ right. His ingrained clone danger sense was still flagging him.

Tal closed his eyes again, but this time he had no intention of resting. He was tuning in to all of his keen senses and trying to get a sense for what it was his body was trying to tell him. Awareness hit him and his eyes snapped back open. It was _too kriffin' quiet. _The injured clone had gotten used to the sounds of the farm over the past week. Now, the eopies weren't making any noises.

Tal pushed up off the couch, ignoring the protests of his ribs. He worked his way into the kitchen, and flipped on the video relay he'd once seen OneOne use to communicate with Tess.

His heart stopped cold at what he saw.

# # #

Tess was cursing herself that she hadn't brought one of the blasters with her.

Fierfek! She always carried those things with her on her rounds around the farm these days, and the one day she forgets to bring it, _he_ shows up again.

Dirk's breath was fetid as he pushed up against the barn wall.

"You haven't come into town in the longest time," Dirk said, pressing himself closer to her, "no one has seen you. I was starting to get a bit worried, Tess."

Tess could tell he had been drinking. Normally his disgusting advances did not get this bold.

"So, I said to myself: 'Dirk, you would be remiss in your duties as a Kali citizen if you did not go check on that poor lonely girl Tess. After all, you two have been friends since you was just little kids and all. So, here I am!'"

Tess tried to push Dirk off of her, but he was much too heavy for her.

"Dirk, we're both 25. Honestly, that hardly qualifies me as a 'girl.' Just go home, OK? You're drunk," Tess pushed against him again, trying to dislodge him.

Dirk leered, "Oh, yes, Tess. Keep doing that. I do like it when you grind against me like that. Uh huh…" He shoved his hips up against her. "Did you like that?"

Tess gritted her teeth in annoyance. This was about the worst she had seen Dirk. He had never been this physically forceful. "Go home, Dirk, or I swear I'll call the authorities. No, I'll call your _father._ Shab! I'm calling both of them if you don't get out of here _**right now**_." Tess tried to stomp her foot for emphasis, but her drunken neighbor was was in such close proximity that she couldn't even move her legs.

Her movements just encouraged Dirk to squeeze himself up against her even more.

"Now that is not being very neighborly, Tess. I came all this way just to come check on you."

"Dirk! No! I said leave!" Tess tried once again to push him off of her. She felt panic begin to well up when she realized that this time he wasn't going to take 'no' for an answer.

"But, I just got here!" Dirk rubbed himself closer. "Come on, Tess. You know you want me. Let's have some fun!"

"No! Dirk, I've never wanted you. Go home!"

With disgust, Tess could feel that Dirk was heavily aroused. Her efforts to push him off were just exciting him even more.

"I like it when you get feisty!" Dirk said, pressing his mouth down on hers. He began pulsating his hips against hers and groaning. Tess pounded her fists against his chest to no avail.

"Get off of me!" Tess shouted.

"You want me," Dirk said, reaching down to free himself from his pants, "I know you do." He unbuckled his belt, and began tugging down his underpants.

"NO!" Tess shouted, "get off of-"

Suddenly, Tess felt the weight of Dirk being lifted off of her. A moment later, she heard the distinctive sound of a bone cracking followed by Dirk's high-pitched scream.

"Tal," Tess whispered in astonishment.

Faster than her eye could follow, her nemesis had been pinned to the ground with this arm bent behind his head at an awkward angle.

"AHHHHH! MY ARM!" Dirk screamed.

Tal was upon Dirk like a fury. The clone's armored fists and elbows were hammered into Dirk with lightning-fast accuracy. Within seconds, the drunken man was crumpled up into a ball shouting out in pain.

The former soldier showed no mercy as he continued to strike. Tess watched stunned, seeing Tal's fight for the first-time. With just one good hand, the clone cracked Dirk's nose with a palm strike. Pinning his victim down with an armored knee, Tal proceeded to crack ribs using his armored elbow. At that point, the clone stopped, breathing heavily. His hand was now poised above Dirk's windpipe, palm-strike down, ready to deliver a killing blow.

"Say the word, Tess," Tal said, his voice low and deep.

Dirk began whimpering, "Please- don't…."

Tess stared back and forth between Tal and Dirk. After taking a moment to recover from the shock of how quickly everything had happened, Tess blinked and began considering the question. She crossed her arms and glared at Dirk. "I don't know. He has been a thorn in my side for a long time..." She chewed on her lip, as if giving the matter deep thought.

"Better to just kill him then," Tal growled.

"WAIT!" Dirk said, "I'll never come here again!" Dirk blathered around his profusely bleeding nose. "I'm sorry! I'm so sorry, Tess! I didn't mean it!"

The clone snorted at this, and glared down at the man pinned down underneath him, "Be easier just to kill you," he intoned, in a flat-deadly voice, leaning even closer to his victim.

"Who are you?" Dirk whispered, in absolute terror.

"_I'm_ with Tess," Tal said, in a deep husky voice. He said it in such a possessive tone that the young Kalisimmons farmers felt a thrill go straight through her stomach. Suddenly, she wanted nothing more than some alone time with Tal.

"Just get him out of here," Tess said, narrowing her eyes at Dirk.

"Up," Tal hissed, in a cold voice that brokered no argument.

Dirk struggled to comply, staggering to his knees. Suddenly, he began vomiting. His attention diverted, Tess helped Tal up without Dirk noticing.

"You, OK?" Tess whispered.

Tal nodded, and mouthed, "Good. You?"

Tess nodded.

Dirk finished vomiting, and began moaning. Tal went and grabbed a pitchfork. The drunken man stared at the clone and screamed in terror.

Tal rolled his eyes, and stabbed the pitchfork into the ground by Dirk's feet, "Clean that up." He pointed to the mess on the ground.

"My… arm…" Dirk babbled.

Tal drew his blaster with lightning speed, and pushed it between the drunken man's eyes. "I'm giving you three seconds. Count with me. Three… two…"

"I'll clean it up!" Dirk screamed in a high-pitched voice.

Tal took a step back, but kept his blaster drawn with unwavering intensity. With a shaking hand, Dirk clumsily shoveled the messed hay off to the side. Tal gestured for him to put the pitchfork away with the other tools.

Dirk did so, blood dripping from his bleeding nose, and then turned to face Tal and Tess, "I… just want to go home!" he wailed.

Once again moving with lightning speed and accuracy, Tal was on Dirk. He grabbed the thumb on Dirk's unbroken arm and jerked it backwards.

"No! No more!" Dirk wailed.

Tal shook his head in disgust, again, "I'm just helping you outside," he grumbled. He tugged Dirk outside, easily leading him just by his bent thumb. With one final shove, he tossed the drunken man into his speeder.

"Ever plan on coming out here again?" Tal growled, as Dirk struggled to sit up and find the controls.

"No- no- never," staggered out Dirk.

"Good!" Tal smacked Dirk on the back in mock cheerfulness, "because I have _**many, many **_brothers. It would be a shame if I would have to send a few of them after you!"

Dirk turned completely pale, as recognition dawned. He stared at Tal's armor, "You're a clone!"

Tal stood back, crossing his arms across his chest, "Well, well, well…you're not as dumb as you look, Dirk."

"But, but, you all left!" Dirk protested.

Tal leaned forward and got right into the drunken man's face, "Maybe they left a few of us behind to keep an eye on the locals."

Dirk totally paled, "There… are… more of you?" he gasped.

Tal gave the man an evil grin, "We're everywhere. We're clones. There are _millions_ of us."

Dirk looked like he was about to pass out.

"Go," Tal whispered to the terrified man, "and _never_ speak of this to anyone."

"No, never!" Dirk shrieked and nearly ran into the barn in his terrified haste to leave the farm.

# # #

"Wow. Nicely done," Tess said, stepping out from the shadows of the barn.

Tal immediately made his way to her side, and his eyes scanned her face. Then, he looked her up and down, "Are you sure you're OK? Do you want to go inside and lie down?"

Tess laughed, and shook her head, "Well, this is a switch. If I go lie down, will you make me broth?"

The clone's brow lined with confusion, "Make you brother? Tess, I don't know how to make…. "

He caught sight of the farmer's gentle, teasing smile. "Ah…. So, you really are OK?" He blew out a long breath, "Tess, when I saw him with his hands on you-" Tal's unbroken hand clenched into a fist, and his jaw clenched. His body began to tremble with barely suppressed rage.

"Shhhhhh…." Tess soothed. She gently wrapped her arms around Tal's waist, and gently laid her head against his chest. She was careful of his injured ribs and back.

Tal tucked his chin down and rested it down on the farm girl's head.

"Tess," he said, simply, breathing out.

They stayed like that for a long moment, simply holding each other in the moonlight outside the barn.

Tess eventually led out a contented sigh and then reached a hand up to run it through Tal's hair. She turned his head so she could seek out his lips.

The kiss started gently, a careful exploration in the moonlight. But, it quickly began to progress into something hungry and eager.

Tal broke it off and pulled back.

"What's wrong?" Tess asked, looking up at him with concerned eyes, still slightly glazed over with the passion from their kissing.

The clone shook his head, "Tess, after what happened tonight, are you sure… you want… If we keep kissing like this…" His face flushed, and he had difficulties finishing the sentence. He looked away, and refused to meet Tess' eyes.

"Yes, I'm sure," Tess leaned up and kissed Tal on the lips gently and reassuringly, "but, thank you for asking." She looked up at him in wonder, "It's amazing that you did, actually."

Tal looked at her in confusion, trying to figure out what he did that was so amazing.

Tess just laughed again, thinking that was the best part about Tal. He could be so incredible and it was all such a natural part of him. "Come on." She tugged on his hand, and began leading him toward the house.

Tal stopped, and twisted around, "But… the eopies… don't we need…"

Tess shook her head, "Not tonight. The eopies will just have to do without for a night. This is our night."

The clone whooped, startling Tess, "Hah! I finally win out over the eopies!"

She put her arm around his waist, as they made their way to the house, "Uh huh. And, what in all of Kali was that about?"

Tal flushed, "Just an eopie thing."

# # #

"Are you hungry?" Tess asked when they entered the house.

"Well, always," Tal admitted, "but, I don't think I could eat now knowing that we're going to…. uh…" he flushed, turned red, and wouldn't meet Tess' eyes again.

Now that they were in the house, and the full reality of what they were about to do hit Tess, she flushed, too. "Yeah, uh, me neither."

An awkward silence ensued, and they both just stood there in the middle of the darkened living room. Tess noticed Tal was watching her intently. Finally, he spoke.

"Tess," he said softly, "are you sure about… this? We don't need… to….Maybe waiting… would be better?" He began rubbing her arms gently. He still had his armored gloves on, and the sensation of his rough gloves felt odd over her farm coat.

Tess shook her head, "No, Tal. This is what I want…" she looked up and met his eyes. "_You _are what I want… I'm just nervous." She laughed, and then admitted, "I've never done this before."

Tal laughed then, too, "That makes two of us, Tess."

"Really?" Tess breathed out a long sigh of relief.

Tal rolled his eyes, "Well, when would I have ever… if I've never met any…" he shrugged, and shook his head. "Never mind. So…. uh…" He had no idea how to proceed.

Tess lifted up one of Tal's hands and noticed he had some blood on the hand he'd used in his fight with Dirk. "Are _you_ OK?"

"Not mine," Tal said, flexing his hand, "I'm fine."

"Yuck," Tess said, wrinkling her nose.

"I can go clean my armor," Tal immediately offered.

Tess' eyes immediately lit up, "How about a shower?"

"With my armor?" Tal's brow furrowed with confusion.

"No," Tess laughed at how literally her clone always took things. She gave him a smile, full of promise, and his eyes widened as recognition dawned.

# # #

Tal gulped audibly as Tess undressed him in the refresher. As the last piece of his armor was stacked beside him, Tal stood in front of Tess, naked, except for the bandages covering his chest and hand. His honey brown eyes gazed intently into hers, waiting, for her next move.

Tess took a step back, and her gaze swept up and down him, appreciatively. She'd seen him unclothed before while helping care for him but now after having seen him fight so spectacularly the room seemed filled with his masculine presence.

She studied the man in front of her from head to toe, truly appreciating his fine build, "You're beautiful, Tal," Tess breathed.

Tal shook his head, "I think I'm supposed to say that to you."

"No, you were right. You _are_ perfect."

Tal quirked an eyebrow at that, "No pressure, though, then, huh? You're going to give me performance anxiety."

"Performance anx-" Tess sputtered, and burst out laughing.

Tal shook his head, "And, now she laughs at me. I believe you have insulted my honor, Tess. There needs to be some sort of payback for that…"

Using those quick reflexes that amazed Tess so much, Tal reached behind him flicked on the water, then gripped the surprised farmer and tossed her into the refresher fully dressed.

"Tal!" she shrieked, as the water soaked her clothing.

Tal followed her into the refresher, grinning. "Yes?" his face was a complete mask of innocence.

"You are in so much trouble," Tess said, her eyes narrowed. But, as the water streamed down around Tal's short-cropped hair, and the steam gathered around his muscular frame, she lost her train of thought.

Tal seemed similarly distracted as he noticed how Tess looked with her clothes plastered to her skin. She'd already discarded her heavy coat and shoes. Her shirt was sticking to her skin, and outlining every curve of her slim frame. Her pants now clung to her slim waist.

Tal's jaw dropped, and then he simply murmured, "Kriff."

His good hand reached out to trace the neckline of her shirt, and Tess shivered.

"You look so good, Tess," Tal murmured, and she could hear the absolute sincerity behind his impassioned declaration. Then, he gripped her by the back of her wet shirt and pulled her against him.

His mouth descended upon hers, and he was completely lost in the sensation of kissing his fruit farmer. As the kiss deepened, his good hand began to work at the buttons on Tess' shirt.

Impatient, Tess reached up with both hands and simply ripped the shirt up and over her head, temporarily interrupting their kiss.

"Sorry," she said, grinning, as she threw the wet shirt to the floor of the refresher, with a resounding 'thwop,' "but the shirt just had to go."

"No argument here," Tal said. "Although, I did like the way you looked in it." He took in the sight of Tess in her bra, the water streaming over her chest. No sooner had his eyes adjusted to the sight than Tess had stripped the garment off. Tal suddenly found it difficult to breathe, but, in a good way. He'd seen holos of naked women, but nothing could compare him to this reality. "Whoa, Tess…. wow."

Tess looked up and met his eyes, and tentatively smiled. "I'm going to finish getting undressed, OK? These pants are starting to weigh a kilo. I don't want to drown in here," she teased.

"I'd save you," Tal said.

His voice was teasing, but Tess knew from his performance earlier that evening that he _would_ save her. Just that reminder alone filled her with all manner of emotions as she stripped off her sodden pants. She slid her underwear off her hips, and dropped them into the discarded pile of clothes. Tess lifted her eyes to Tal's. The intensity in his gaze was scorching.

"Tess," he breathed again, and ran his good hand down her side, along her hip.

She shivered from the sensation.

"I can't believe how you look," the clone shook his head, "I never imagined…" his gaze swept up and down her body, heating her up with its' intensity. "So incredible."

Tess just had to kiss Tal after that, and she quickly learned that naked kissing in the shower was just as incredible as kissing Tal in the moonlight. Perhaps… even slightly more so…

Tess grabbed the soap, and started by washing Tal's arms, chest and hands. Then, she soaped up his hips. Tal sucked in his breath, and felt his member, already erect from the prolonged kissing, jerk in surprise. Tess took a deep breath, eyed _that_ part of him, and tentatively brushed a hand across it. Tal moaned.

Tess looked up at him in concern, "Are you OK?"

Tal nodded, his voice strained, "Yes…go on… please."

Encouraged, Tess rubbed the soap onto Tal. He gasped, and then hissed out softly, "Tess…"

Tess smiled, pleased with her newfound power, and ran the soap all the way up and down its' length.

"OK, that's clean enough!" Tal said, grabbing the soap from her, and pulling her back up for a kiss. As the kiss deepened, Tess opened up her mouth slightly, and felt Tal's tongue lightly touch up against hers. She gasped at the new sensation. She wrapped her arms him, careful of his ribs, but eager for more of the feel of his body against hers.

As Tal's mouth continued to prod against hers, she felt his member pressing against her lower body. She wanted more, but didn't know if they could accomplish it in the shower. After more intense minutes of kissing and pressing, they paused for a moment's rest, just gazing at each other with a kind of amazed wonder.

"We should probably move to the bed," Tess said, her head lying up against her clone's wet shoulder.

"No," came the reply from the muscled shoulder beneath her head.

Tess looked at him in surprise.

"I didn't get to wash you," Tal gave her a charming grin, and grabbed the soap. "Turn around." He made a hand gesture, indicating that she should turn.

He soaped her back, working in a gentle massage with it. She moaned as he continued to knead her muscles.

"I need to do this for you, all the time, after all you've helped me," Tal vowed.

"Tal, that isn't necessary," Tess said, her voice slightly slurred and drowsy from contentment, as he continued to knead her back. Then, she began to giggle, as Tal's hands continued on down and began to knead her buttocks. "You are _most_ thorough."

"Oh, I'm not done," Tal murmured, his hands began to dip still lower.

Tess sucked in her breath in anticipation. No man had ever touched her _there_ before.

Tal's hand slowly, and tantalizingly worked its way around to the front. Tess gasped as Tal began stroking her intimately. The clone watched all of his lover's reactions carefully. He touched her gently, prodding, and exploring. As he began to press on more sensitive areas, she moaned and leaned against him, breathing hitched. Tal used his hands to imitate the intimate act he hoped they would soon be doing together. When she moaned out load, he grinned with manly satisfaction at what he'd accomplished.

The water in the shower was beginning to cool to an uncomfortable level. Tal wondered if he should just shut the water off, or if they should-

"Tal, the bed," Tess implored, looking up at him, with passion evident in her eyes.

The clone reached back and shut off the water. The air in the room was cool, and Tess began to shiver.

Tal reached behind her and grabbed a towel. With swift expert strokes, he dried off the upper portions of his fruit farmer, giving special attention to her breasts. He tried to bend down to dry the rest of her, but sucked in his breath as pain hit his healing ribs.

"Tal," Tess admonished, pushing him back up gently, "easy."

Tal nodded, putting a bracing hand against his ribs. Tess dashed the towel hurriedly against her legs, and then turned her attention to drying off Tal. She took her time, thoroughly enjoying rubbing the towel up against his muscular frame. Tess could feel Tal's heated gaze upon her the entire time she was rubbing the towel against him.

"Enough," Tal finally growled, ripping the towel from her fingertips, and roughly putting it back it it's magni-holder.

Tess shivered again, partially from standing in the cold room, but also from anticipation about what they were about to do.

"It will be warm in the bed," she whispered, nodding her head to indicate they should head to the room next door, her bedroom.

"Yes, definitely."

Tess looked at him for a moment, "Oh, so you're already proud of your male prowess, are you?"

He gave her a confident smile, and then just pulled her up against him. He locked his hands behind her buttocks, and just let their bodies touch. She gasped as she felt his hard member prodding against her. He slyly arched an eyebrow, and looked at her.

Tess shook her head, "Incorrigible." She grabbed his hand, and led him to the bedroom, "Come on."

Tal grinned, and followed her into her bedroom. He looked around the room, but then decided he'd familiarize himself with it later. Right now, he was more concerned with the bed. Tess had already climbed under the covers. Tal followed her under. He wrapped his little farmer tightly in his arms, just as he had the night before when she was chilled. He held her for a long moment, while they warmed up. It just felt nice to hold her, especially when they were both naked. But, he was erect, and it wasn't long before simply holding her just wasn't enough.

The clone pushed Tess onto her back. He started by nuzzling her neck. She giggled. Then, he began running light kisses up and down her face. Suddenly, Tal stopped.

"Why'd you stop?" Tess asked, a bit breathless.

Tal looked into her eyes, "Did I thank you for saving my life?" he asked, his eyes heavily lidded with arousal.

"Yes, actually, you did. Several times, already," Tess replied, both amused and touched.

Tal nodded, and resumed kissing her. He worked his way down to her chest, and began exploring them with both his hands and his mouth. He quickly decided that he liked breasts very much.

"Tal," Tess breathed, restlessly.

"Mmmmm?" Tal replied, his mouth full for the moment.

"Tal," she groaned, gripping his buttocks, restlessly, and rubbing her body up against his, "enough of this."

"Enough of what?" he teased.

"Tal!" Tess said, frustrated, and gripping his erect member to get his attention.

"Tess!" he responded, eyes wide.

She began stroking him, noticing his reaction, seeing it worked just as it had in the shower. He gasped, and shivered. She began to increase her pace.

"Enough, Tess!" Tal pulled her hand away, "or, I won't last!"

"Last? What are you saving it for? Come on, then!" She grabbed his member and guided it toward her entrance. Tess positioned her body, encouraging him on.

"You sure you're ready for this?" Tal looked into Tess' eyes, giving her one last chance to back out.

"Tal!" Tess said, impatiently, "I swear, if you don't-"

Tal cut her off with a kiss, and drove his shaft into her entrance. Tess cried out as he penetrated her. He stopped once he had made the initial penetration, giving her time to adjust to his size. She froze up from the pain of the initial joining.

Tal stared down at her, "Are you sure you're OK, Tess? Should I-" he began to pull back.

Tess shook her head, "No. It's fine. I was just a bit startled. It burns a bit. I wasn't expecting that."

Tal looked devastated, "I'm sorry, Tess. I didn't mean to hurt you-"

The little farmer cut off his protestations by grinding her lips to his. She kept kissing him until both of them forgot what it is they had been talking about, and both of their bodies began to relax again. The pain faded away for Tess, and she found that she wanted to_ move._

She reached her hands back, and gripped Tal's firm muscular buttocks. His strong hips thrust into her with swift confident movements. Tess could feel their kisses building up, just as they had in the shower. She heard Tal moan with pleasure, and felt great feminine satisfaction that she could please him so much. She felt pressure building within herself, and the pace of their kissing grew more frantic.

"Kriff, Tess, so amazing," Tal groaned, his hips began sliding into her even faster, and she could feel sweat building up between them.

"Tess!" Tal shuddered. Tess felt herself build to a climax and explode. She cried out, and then lay back, completely spent.

Tal looked over at her, smiling, and breathing heavily, "Hey, when I catch my breath, do you want to do that again?"

# # #

Tal picked up on the rhythm of working on the farm like he had been born to Kalisimmon farming. Tess shook her head in wonder some days, surprised that this man who worked the land so well had been created for the sole purpose of fighting. They worked side-by-side in the orchards, and tending to the upkeep on the farmstead. Tal got along surprisingly well with the eopies. Soon, the domesticated beasts preferred him over Tess.

"Ungrateful beasts," Tess told them, playfully sticking her tongue out at the traitorous eopies.

A nightly shower, lovemaking, and watching HNN before dozing off became a comfortable nightly routine for the new couple. It was a warm sticky evening, after a heavy rainfall, and Tal had already fallen asleep after putting in an extra long day on the farm. Tess was still up, watching the news on HNN. Suddenly, the big news story broke…

"Tal," Tess' voice was tinged with a sort of nervous curiosity. The slumbering clone beside her was instantly awake and alert. The pretty farmer pointed to the screen. "Something big is going on in Coruscant."

Two over-excited HNN reporters were going back and forth reporting about the kidnapping of the Chancellor, and speculation about an impending Separatist invasion of the planet. As they watched the spectacle unfold, with a sort of morbid fascination, the Chancellor was rescued. But, the anticipated invasion and battle also unfolded and the planet was under siege.

Tal watched the battle scenes with a grim intensity, as the HNN cameras captured shot of shot of Republic fighters engaged in battles with droid fighters.

"Do you feel like you should be there?" Tess asked softly, leaning into Tal supportively.

"Yes," Tal admitted, "I see my brothers fighting, and dying. I'm not there with them. I don't know. I…" He blew out a breath, and just shook his head.

Tess hugged him tightly and just held him. As daylight broke, she got up and made them a strong pot of tea. They continued to watch the events unfold together, but neither of them was hungry for breakfast.

The most surreal news came hours later… Tess and Tal just stared at the screen in disbelief as they learned that the Jedi had unsuccessfully tried to overthrow the Chancellor, and had been 'put down' by the military.

"Order 66," Tal muttered, his brow furrowed in puzzlement, "I never thought…"

As they watched the news coverage of clone troops marching into the temple, and then the Jedi Temple burning, the couple was completely silent.

Tal finally left the room, without saying anything, and headed to the barn. He stayed there for hours, sitting alone with the eopies. As the former soldier stared around the barn, he puzzled over everything he'd seen on HNN.

He hadn't much cared for General Dayu. But, he still felt saddened to learn the Jedi were gone. It somehow felt odd, not quite right, to be living in a galaxy without Jedi. Tal couldn't explain the feeling, because he didn't fully understand it. Something just felt all _wrong_ somehow.

He was subdued for days, and didn't want to talk about it with Tess. His little farmer gave him space, and let him work through it.

For the first time since they'd become a couple, Tal didn't want to make love at night. He began sleeping on the couch in the living room, staying up until all hours watching news of the newly formed "Empire" on HNN.

After they finished their work on the farm during the day, Tal began taking the speeder and heading over to the clone gravesite. Tess always offered to accompany him, but the former soldier just shook his head.

Tess tried not to let her hurt show. She missed Tal. She missed their relationship. She missed the way things used to be with them. This moody silence was awful, and she couldn't bear much more of it.

One morning, a few days later, she awoke early. Her stomach was roiling. She tried to make it to the refresher, but only got as far as the sink. She held on to the sides of the sink, as her stomach emptied itself. Suddenly, there were soothing hands rubbing her back.

She felt Tal's hand reach for her forehead, and check for a fever. She shook her head. "I don't think I have a fever. I'm alright," she said. She reached forward to turn on the sink, and clean up the mess.

Tal's hand covered hers, stopping her. "Lie down. You're sick," his voice was concerned.

"No, Tal, it's OK," she looked down in consternation at the mess in the sink, "I'll clean this up. You don't have to-"

Before she could get in another word of protest, Tal had lifted her into his arms and carried her back to bed. He tucked her in and kissed her on the forehead.

"Rest," he admonished, his eyes still concerned.

Tess felt a tear trickle down her cheek.

"Are you crying?" Tal looked stricken, "Is it because you're sick?"

Tess shook her head, and whispered, "I just missed you."

The clone hung his head down, "I'm sorry."

Tess reached up, putting one finger gently under his chin to push his head back up, "You don't need to apologize. I just missed you. When you completely held yourself back from me over the past few days, it was hard because I was missing the best thing in my life."

"Me?" Tal looked surprised.

Tess nodded, "Yes, you."

"The sink can wait," Tal climbed gently over Tess, and settled into bed next to her, "and the eopies can wait, too." He pulled Tess down onto his chest, and began gently stroking her hair. Tess sighed in contentment. "Just let me know if you want to hurl again, OK? So, I can at least grab a bin or something."

Tess laughed, "Actually, I feel fine now. I don't know what that was, but it's gone now."

"Huh," Tal murmured, "strange." He kept stroking her hair, and then his hand strayed down to her buttocks, giving them a playful squeeze, "So, you're feeling better? How _much_ better are you feeling?"

# # #

"So, I was thinking, Tal," Tess murmured, over a mouthful of Kalisimmon pancakes. Tal never seemed to tire of them, so Tess had just gotten used to making them with great frequency. "Once the harvest is in, we'll have some free time."

"Free time, eh?" Tal murmured, reaching under the table to squeeze her thigh.

"Yes, Tal," Tess rolled her eyes, "more time for that, but I was also thinking of something else."

Tal's fork, completely overloaded with pancakes drenched in syrup, froze halfway to his mouth, looked at her, puzzled, "What do you mean?"

"I'd like to take a trip to Argamon," Tess said, studying Tal carefully for a reaction.

Tal sucked in a breath deeply, and placed down the bite of food without eating it. "Why would you want to go to Argamon? Trust me, there's nothing to see there. I've been there. That's where Cooper got left-" Tal's eyes got wide.

Tess just waited patiently while he worked it out.

"You mean, go look for Cooper?" Tal said the words quietly, disbelievingly, almost reverently. "But, Tess, that was months ago. The odds of him being alive are…" Tal just shook his head, not even sure how to calculate such odds.

Tess shrugged, "Said by a person who was dropped out of a gunship."

Tal just stared at her. Tess remained quiet, giving Tal time to think. He was quiet for several long moments.

"Odds are, we wouldn't find anything," he said, stubbornly, working through scenario after scenario

Tess remained quiet, giving Tal the space he needed. She could see the change in him, the point at which he'd made a decision.

"And? Should I find someone to watch the herd?" she asked, reaching over to hold one of his hands.

"We're going," Tal said, gripping her hand. "Tess… I… this..." the ex-soldier struggled for words, "…thank you." The last words were whispered. Their eyes met and a healing sort of energy passed between them. As he embraced the woman he'd married just a short while ago, the clone was reassured by the bump of her belly, pressing into him. He released a breath, closed his eyes, and knew in that moment that he'd no longer been left behind.

# # #

_Author's Notes: Any interest in a sequel? Left Behind II? Tal's best friend, Cooper, the medic, was left behind on Agamar. Last time Tal heard from him, his position was about to be overrun by a whole mess of droids and he was presumed._

Updated: November 10, 2014. Thank you for all the feedback re: a sequel. Left Behind II is well under way and will be launching soon.


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